週四(7/21)1.購買習慣---殺價2.2.追求幸福秘訣---哈佛75年研究

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮

左轉  聚會時間7:00pm--9:30pm

購買習慣---殺價

Bargaining in China  travelchinaguide.com

Practice

In bargaing with the seller, stay relaxed but always polite. Be patient and unflappable to facilitate the bargaining process. There are some skills that can be used in the course of bargaining:

1. Cut down considerably from the asking price. The shopkeeper often charges higher prices than the actual value of the goods. Try to reduce the price to half of the asking price, and then spend some time on further negotiation.Generally, the basic rules and conditions of bargaining in different shopping areas are different, so you should know them first in order to make comparisons. Then you can bargain and arrive at a good price that will enhance your shopping experience.

Bargaining when shopping

2. Never express how much you like the things you want to buy, as the seller may use this information to jack up the price. Pretend to be casual and indifferent while strolling around in the shops.

3. Try to find and point out as many flaws as possible in the product. The seller will always describe its excellence and will avoid talking about blemishes; but no product is completely perfect, and you should learn to identify all the flaws in order to gain bargaining leverage. In response, the seller may reduce his asking price.

4. Take some time when choosing and comparing the goods before you propose the price you wish. In this situation, the seller may compromise with you.

5. Pretend to walk away. Generally, this skill works quite well in most shopping places. If the price proposed by the seller is still unacceptable and outside your budget, you can use the walk away technique. Usually, you will be called back again, and the price you offer may be accepted by the shopkeeper.

6. Try to wear plain clothes without jewelry. If your clothes and ornaments make you appear to be rich, the price proposed by the seller will accordingly be a little higher. But this is not a must and should not prevent you from being be yourself.

Q:

What are your opinion after seeing the video film?

Is bargaining with street vendors a good idea?

“Pretend to walk away” is this strategy works?

Tips on How to Bargain and Save Money?

What are the Pros and Cons of Bargaining?

What do you think the street venders in Taiwan?

What are the different shopping cultures around the world?

What do you think about Chinese products?

追求幸福秘訣---哈佛75年研究

The secrets to happiness revealed by the Harvard 75 years study    Businessinsider.com  Tanya Lewis

The researchers surveyed the men about their lives (including the quality of their marriages, job satisfaction, and social activities) every two years and monitored their physical health (including chest X-rays, blood tests, urine tests, and echocardiograms) every five years.

1. Close relationships

The men in both groups of the Harvard study who reported being closer to their family, friends, or community tended to be happier and healthier than their less social counterparts. They also tended to live longer. By comparison, people who said they were lonelier reported feeling less happy. They also had worse physical and mental health, as defined above.

A 2014 review of dozens of studies published in the journal Social and Personality Psychology Compass suggests that loneliness can get in the way of mental functioning, sleep, and well-being, which in turn increases the risk of illness and death.

2. Quality (not quanity) of relationships

It's not just being in a relationship that matters. Married couples who said they argued constantly and had low affection for one another (which study authors defined as "high-conflict marriages") were actually less happy than people who weren't married at all, the Harvard study found.

However, the effect of relationship quality seems to depend somewhat on age. A 2015 study published in the journal Psychology and Aging that followed people for 30 years found that the number of relationships people had was, in fact, more important for people in their 20s, but the quality of relationships had a bigger effect on social and psychological well being when people were in their 30s.

3. Stable, supportive marriages

Being socially connected to others isn't just good for our physical health. It also helps stave off mental decline. People who were married without having divorced, separating, or having "serious problems" until age 50 performed better on memory tests later in life than those who weren't, the Harvard study found.

All of this suggests that strong relationships are critical to our health.

Society places a lot of emphasis on wealth and "leaning in" to our work, Waldinger said. "But over and over, over these 75 years, our study has shown that the people who fared the best were the people who leaned in to relationships, with family, with friends, with community."

 Q:

How to create good quality of life? How to be happier?

How importance about job satisfaction, and social activities?

How friends make us happier?

Are married people happier than singles?

What are the ways to make someone happy?

How our surroundings influence happiness and health?

How to Improving mental and emotional health?

哈佛大學長達75年的「快樂」研究：擁有美好人生的 3 個秘訣      TED X Taiepi

你的人生目標是什麼？

根據一份最近針對千禧年出生的年輕人所做的調查，有超過八成的年輕人表示他們的人生目標是想成為有錢人，而有五成的年輕人說他們另個人生目標是變得有名。

其實並不難想像調查中年輕人對於名利的想望，起因於我們時常被規勸要在工作上全力以赴、接受更多挑戰、達成更高目標；這個想法也使我們對人生產生了一種想像：為了要有美好生活，必須實踐「拼命三郎」的行為模式與生活形態。

由美國哈佛大學教授塔爾班夏哈（Tal Ben-Shahar）所撰寫的暢銷書《更快樂》（Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment）中，以「正向心理學」說明了拼命三郎型的人們把達成目標當成衡量成就的標準，而不重視追求目標的過程，以致於他們無法享受所做的事情，老以為達到某個目標就能得到快樂。

班夏哈教授指出，實證研究和名人事蹟的確顯示，設定目標和個人成就確實有關聯，不過，和快樂之間就沒有直接關係。這也解釋了為何有些人達成目標後，卻沒有感受到原本預期會獲得的快樂感。

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撇開功成名就，但如果其實快樂、健康、滿足感才是我們應該追求的人生終極目標，那又該如何達成？

哈佛大學醫學院臨床精神病學教授羅伯威丁格Robert Waldinger從他所主持的史上最長的「幸福感」（Happiness）研究，給了我們一個值得參考的答案。

這個哈佛大學針對成人生活所作的研究至今已進行75年，而威丁格教授是該研究的第四個主持人。從1938年開始，研究總共追蹤了724位成人，每一年研究團隊都會詢問研究對象的工作、生活、健康等狀況。

類似如此長期的大型研究都會面臨一些挑戰，例如：受測者中途退出、研究經費不足、研究員研究重心轉移或死亡而無人接手。但是基於堅持與運氣，原先的七百多位受測者中，至今還存活的大約有60%，而他們也都已經九十多歲。

研究是從兩大群背景迥異的美國波士頓居民開始。第一組是哈佛大學的大二學生，他們後來在二次世界大戰期間全都完成大學文憑，並且大部份的人都從軍參與戰事。第二組則是從波士頓地區最貧困的地區挑選出來的居民，他們住在破舊的房舍中，許多人家中都沒有乾淨的冷熱水。

當他們同意參加研究後，所有的青少年都被逐一訪談並接受醫療檢查，除此之外，研究人員還到所有研究對象的家中拜訪，親自與他們的父母親面談。後來這些青少年長大成人了，進入各行各業，有工廠工人、律師、瓦工、醫生、某一任美國總統等；也有些人酗酒，有些人患有精神分裂，有些人從社會底層一路往上爬至上流階級，也有些人則往全然不同的方向走。

大概在75年前沒有人可以想像這個研究至今仍持續進行，只是目前研究對象也開始轉向原先七百多位老先生老太太的兩千名子孫。

那麼，從七十幾年來、幾十萬頁的訪談資料與醫療記錄中，究竟帶給我們什麼樣的研究結果與啓發？

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「有個很清楚的訊息：良好的關係讓我們維持快樂與健康。就這樣。」威丁格教授微笑表示，關於「關係」有三個重點：

I. 孤單有害，社交活躍有益健康

與家人、朋友、社群保持較多聯繫的人，心靈比較快樂、身體也較健康；研究也顯示，社交活躍的人比較長壽。孤單的感覺對身心都是毒害，如果人們非自願地感到孤獨，會容易感到不快樂，在中年時健康狀況會提早衰退，大腦功能較早開始退化，因此容易早逝。

II. 友不在數量多寡，而在關係深淺

我們在人群、聚會或婚姻中也會感到孤獨，所以真正重要的是：關係的「質」。高衝突的關係對我們的健康有負面影響，例如：身處爭執不斷的婚姻，可能在健康上，還不如離婚的好。而反之，在良好與溫暖的關係中，對健康就有保護作用。

根據研究，人們進入五十歲時，影響他們日後的健康狀況的，不是膽固醇高低，而是他們對目前所在關係的滿意度。意思是說，在五十歲對關係擁有最高滿意度的人，在八十歲時是最健康的一群。顯然，親密的關係能減緩老化帶來的生理與心理衝擊。

III. 良好關係不只保護身體，也保護腦力

研究顯示，是否能在年老時感受到仰賴與信任另一方，對於腦部健康有重大影響。八十幾歲的老先生若能感覺到有可以依靠的對象，他的記憶力就能更長時間地保持清晰；反推之，若老先生沒有這種感受，他就可能提早面臨記憶力衰退。

從這個75年研究結果所得的智慧，在在說明了關係的重要—最快樂健康的人是與家人朋友擁有親密關係的那些人。只不過，對絕大多數的人而言，維持關係並不是件簡單的事，如著名心理學家阿德勒也曾說過，人的煩惱都是從人際關係而來。

「美好人生建立在良好關係上。」威丁格教授在結語強調著，雖然不容易，但是卻值得我們投入精神時間。不論你現在是二十五、四十或六十歲，問問自己，除了追求工作成就，你是否也想開始打造你的美好人生呢？

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週二(7/19)1.火車爆炸事件與孤立者2.卡車恐攻 3.機器人殺手引發爭議

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮

左轉       聚會時間7:00pm--9:30pm

火車爆炸事件與孤立者

Signs indicate train explosion suspect a total loner    By George Liao  Taiwan News

Signs indicate Lin Ying-chang, who police suspect of detonating a homemade bomb on a commuter train in Taipei on Thursday evening that injured 25 people including himself, is a total loner.

So far, the police have not been able to determine motives for causing the explosion.

Lin, 55, who was severely injured in the explosion, is recovering at an intensive care unit at hospital and expected to be able to face police questioning in a short time.

Police found that Lin, who has a criminal record that includes offenses such as theft and drunk driving, has a son from a marriage that only last for two years. Lin, who reportedly has long been receiving treatment for tonsil cancer, left home six years ago and has since estranged himself from the outside world. No one knows what happened to him before his alleged detonation of an explosive device on a commuter train on Thursday, and no one knows what made him to do so.

From Lin’s phone communication record, police was able to identify that Lin had left his van and his pet dog, “Daughter,” in a mountainous township in Nantou County, central Taiwan. When police found the car , they saw “Daughter” inside, waiting helplessly for her owner to come back and barking at strangers who were approaching her.

Police said Lin apparently had been living in his car as it was filled with household belongings.

According to media reports, before allegedly causing the explosion, Lin had left a note for his family that reads like a will, as he expected he would die in the accident.

Social Isolation / Loneliness    mentalhealthdaily.com

Being socially isolated from society can take a toll on mental health and lead a person to become depressed and consider suicide. Socializing and interacting with other people is a basic human need. If social needs are not met, a person can start to feel lonely which leads to depression and possibly suicidal thoughts. Loneliness is defined as a general feeling of sadness as a result of being alone or feeling disconnected from others.

Isolation is being separated from others in your environment. Someone can become isolated based on circumstances (i.e. employment) or as a result of personal decisions. Various reasons that a person could feel lonely or isolated include: living alone, death of a close friend or family member, poor physical health, mental illness, being introverted, fear of rejection, and/or retirement.

Living isolated from others can lead to an array of problems including mental health conditions, low energy, substance abuse, negative feelings, and/or sleep problems. If the loneliness and/or social isolation is not addressed, it may lead someone to consider suicide as an escape from their situation.

Q:

What are your opinions about the train explosion?

Dose Social Isolation / Loneliness a problem?  

How can help a person to become depressed?

Why is social interaction important for humans?

Is being introverted bad?

How to protect Public Safety?

How to stop negative feelings?

卡車恐攻

Truck attacker kills 84 on Bastille Day in Nice

France has been stunned and sickened by a third massacre in 18 months in which a truck driver mowed down night-time crowds celebrating Bastille Day on the seafront in Nice. He killed at least 84 people and injured scores more, many of them small children.

Q:

What do you think about this this terrible attack?

How to survive in a terrorist attack?

機器人殺手引發爭議

Killer Robot Used by Dallas Police Opens Ethical Debate    By michael liedtke ABC news

When Dallas police used a bomb-carrying robot to kill a sniper, they also kicked off an ethical debate about technology's use as a crime-fighting weapon.

In what appears to be an unprecedented tactic, police rigged a bomb-disposal robot to kill an armed suspect in the fatal shootings of five officers in Dallas. While there doesn't appear to be any hard data on the subject, security experts and law enforcement officials said they couldn't recall another time when police have deployed a robot with lethal intent.

The strategy opens a new chapter in the escalating use of remote and semi-autonomous devices to fight crime and protect lives. It also raises new questions over when it's appropriate to dispatch a robot to kill dangerous suspects instead of continuing to negotiate their surrender.

"If lethally equipped robots can be used in this situation, when else can they be used?" says Elizabeth Joh, a University of California at Davis law professor who has followed U.S. law enforcement's use of technology. "Extreme emergencies shouldn't define the scope of more ordinary situations where police may want to use robots that are capable of harm."

Dallas Police Chief David Brown defended his department's decision. "Other options would have exposed our officers to great danger," he said.

Dallas Mayor Mike Rawlings applauded Brown for making "the right call" and said he would have no qualms about resorting to the same strategy in the future. "When there's no other way, I think this is a good example," he said. "The key thing is to keep our police out of harm's way."

Police have been using such robots for decades to dispose of suspected bombs and in hostage standoffs and fires. Meanwhile, militaries around the world have come to rely on their robotic friends to disable improvised explosive devices — a need that only increased with the U.S. occupation of Iraq following its 2003 invasion.

Q:

What do you think about a bomb-carrying robot to kill a suspect?

Should humans create "killer robots"?

Could robots help cut crime? If a robot commit some crime act what can we do?

"If lethally equipped robots can be used in this situation, when else can they be used?"

When robots take all the work, what'll be left for us to do?

Could robots change our lives in the near future?

What are the benefits to having a robot girlfriend?

What are the benefits to having a robotic servant?

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週二(7/12)1. 為何愛上浪漫電影? 2. 遍地人工美女

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮

左轉       聚會時間7:00pm--9:30pm

(本周四(7/14)/周五(7/15)聚會 暫停一次     

請支持7/12星期二聚會)

愛上浪漫電影?

/我就要你好好的

Why People Keep Watching Romance Films    ezinemark.com

Nothing can be better than going to the theater and getting mushy about the latest romantic movie on the big screen. You see your favorite actor or actress falling in love, and it gets your heart pounding, thinking it can also happen in real life. Usually, the movie’s theme is the just same, with a slight tweaking in the plot, yet people keep coming back to watch. Why is that so?

The romantic genre also often explores one of several common themes, like forbidden love, love at first sight, destiny, sex, and tragedy. These films serve as inspiration for other people, especially when the couple in the film overcomes their difficulties and lives “happily ever after”. However, not all films end happily, with some being so tragic that it moves audiences and inspires them more.

One watches romance films not only for inspiration, but also for escape. They remind viewers about the experience of love, and let them forget about the harsh reality that romance is different in the real world. This is why a lot of people watch free streaming movies online again and again, to experience the selfless love these films depict.

Me Before You  wiki

Louisa Clark must find a new job after being laid off from a café. She finds work as a caregiver for Will Traynor, a cynical former banker who was completely paralyzed by a motorcycle accident two years prior. At first, he reacts coldly to her spunkiness, but they soon become friends and develop feelings for each other.

Louisa learns that Will has given his parents six months before they must bring him to Switzerland for euthanasia. Will cannot deal with the pain and suffering of his disability. Louisa secretly makes it her mission to change his mind and takes him on all the adventures that she can to prove that life is worth living. However, at their final trip to Mauritius with Will's nurse Nathan, Will confesses he intends to follow through with the euthanasia and asks for her to accompany him.

She is heartbroken and does not speak to him the rest of the trip. After they arrive home, she goes to Switzerland to see Will in his final moments. After his death, he bequeaths her enough money to continue her education and instructs her to "live well".

Q:

Why Romantic movies popular?    

Could love story movies make your heart pounding?

What do you think about the common themes, like forbidden love, love at first sight, destiny, sex, and tragedy in Romantic movies?

What do you think about “Assisted suicide”?

Is” Assisted suicide” permitted “in Taiwan?

Would you take care of your partner if he/her was paralyzed?

What movies inspired you the most?

遍地人工美女

I Can't Stop Looking at These South Korean Women Who've Had Plastic Surgery     jezebel.com

There's a full-length mirror and a scale on every single floor of the all-girls high school where Julia Lurie works. She's an American teaching English in South Korea, the country with the highest per capita rate of plastic surgery in the world. One in five women in Seoul have undergone some kind of procedure. Most popular: Eyelid surgery, to make the eyes "more Western," and getting your jawbone shaved or chiseled down for a less-square and more V-shaped look.

"When you are applying for university or appling for a job here, you put a picture of yourself on your resume or application," Lurie says in a recent segment on This American Life (you can listen to here). "It is sort of taken for granted that how you look will often go into the decision." She says she's been told that if there are two otherwise equal candidates, the prettier person will get the job. Her students see this as normal — perhaps unsurprising when you consider the nation's status as the country most obsessed with plastic surgery.

As an experiment, Lurie asked her students to describe a beautiful woman. "White skin," they replied. "Big eyes." Thin. Tall. B cup. Sounds like the same narrow standards of beauty fashion magazines and designers doing runway shows adhere to, standards that are eventually broadcast with images seen around the world.

A Tumblr called Korean Plastic Surgery features photographs of young South Koreans supposedly before and after plastic surgery. Some of the "after" images look as though they could be Photoshopped, but many are clearly the results of the scalpel. Eyes are larger. Noses are less wide, more streamlined, narrower. Having a bridge in the nose seems very important. Square or prominent jaws are made delicate, V-shaped, smaller. Clicking through, it's obvious that there is indeed one specific way that is considered the best way for a woman to look, and it's a cross between Belle and Chinese actress Fan Bing Bing. (Fan Bing Bing, by the by, is rumored to have gone under the knife for larger eyes.)

There are a few things unsettling about the images, especially the ones in which the entire shape of the face is changed thanks to bone shaving. Somehow eyelids and nose cartilage still seem rather surface-level, whereas changing the shape of your skull just feels extreme and intense. And what about the parents of these men and women? Are they sad when their offspring, whom they've created from their own genetic material, change the jaws and eyes and noses given to them by their mother, grandmother, great-grand-mother? Or maybe the parents have already had their bones shaved, or paid for the kids' surgery, or would if they could.

Q:

Plastic surgery good or bad?

Why some people obsess with plastic surgery?

What do you think that Taiwanese women who've had plastic surgery?

What do you think that plastic surgical clinics almost everywhere in Taiwan?

Do you think having a good look is important for applying a job?

What are the universal beauty standards?

 “Chinese actress fan bing bing is rumored to have gone under the knife for larger eyes”

What are your opinion about celebrities have gone under the knife?

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週四(7/7)1.我就要你好好的(談安樂死)2. 迪士尼與中國人水準

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮

我就要你好好的(談安樂死)

”Me Before You”

Louisa Clark is an ordinary girl living an exceedingly ordinary life—steady boyfriend, close family—who has never been farther afield than their tiny village. She takes a badly needed job working for ex–Master of the Universe Will Traynor, who is wheelchair bound after an accident. Will has always lived a huge life—big deals, extreme sports, worldwide travel—and now he’s pretty sure he cannot live the way he is.

 Will is acerbic, moody, bossy—but Lou refuses to treat him with kid gloves, and soon his happiness means more to her than she expected. When she learns that Will has shocking plans of his own, she sets out to show him that life is still worth living.

Boycotting ‘”Me Before You”  Alex Schadenberg

The Euthanasia Prevention Coalition is urging its supporters to boycott Me Before You in order not to give any money to the production of movies that perpetuate the ideology that death is better than living with a disability.

We also urge our supporters to donate the admission price to either: Not Dead Yet, Not Dead Yet UK, or the Euthanasia Prevention Coalition.

This is not a campaign to obstruct free speech; this is a campaign to oppose the line this movie promotes. Not only is death portrayed as better than living with a disability, but the ultimate act of love, for a person who lives with a disability, is his or her own death.

In the Me Before You plot, Will Traynor, who was paralysed in an accident, decides to die by assisted suicide at a Swiss suicide clinic. His family, who is incredibly wealthy, hires Louisa Clark, as his care-giver.

As the story progresses, Clark falls in love with Traynor, but Traynor has decided that death is better than living with a disability. Traynor dies by assisted suicide in Switzerland and, of course, he loves Clark so much he leaves her an inheritance.

What is most insidious about the movie is that Traynor’s suicide is sold as an act of love. For me that borders on what I call “disability death porn.”

Q:

Assisted suicide: where to go to die?

Do you agree or disagree with euthanasia?

What are you opinions that about assisted suicide clinics at a Swiss?

Is ”assisted suicide” permitted “in Taiwan?

How will you live if you were paralyzed?

Is caregiver a good job?

Is life really worth living?

迪士尼與中國人水準

Chinese Tourists Ruin Shanghai Disneyland  asiancorrespondent.com

THOUSANDS of tourists and revelers in China flocked to the unopened Disneytown complex at the Shanghai Disney Resort to catch a glimpse of the new theme park, but the visit to the Magic Kingdom became a nightmare for some due to the misbehavior of others.

The ‘preview’ of the park was in line with the opening day of Line 11’s Disney Resort station. Although the park only opens its gates next month, a number of badly behaved tourists were already seen wreaking havoc outside the venue, with some defacing lampposts, trampling on flowers, and excreting in the compound.

The Shanghai Daily reported 8,000 commuters had arrived at the station by 5pm on Monday to visit the resort’s shopping, dining and entertainment district, which is open to the public free of charge.

The paper reported Disney staff welcoming visitors on arrival, taking photos for them and guiding them through the various unopened shops and restaurants.

Visitors were also treated to a stroll through Wishing Star Park and Lake at the station’s No. 1 exit, which provides the quickest access to the resort.

However, lifestyle news site Shanghaiist highlighted the social media buzz on Weibo with pictures demonstrating examples of “uncivilized behavior” that has tainted the reputation of Chinese tourists at home and abroad.

According to the site, Disneyland’s meticulous gardening bore the brunt of the bad behavior, after being trampled, trashed, and excreted on.

Q:

What do you think the news reported that Chinese tourists ruin shanghai Disneyland?

What do you think about Disneylands or theme parks in Taiwan?

What do you think about Chinese tourists? Why are Chinese tourists so rude?

How to deal with rude people?

How to have good manners?

How to have good manners as a tourist?

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