週四 (12/20)1.如何成為網紅? 2.快樂的迷思

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

如何成為網紅?

How to Become an Internet Celebrity

techspirited

First and foremost decide on what kind of fame you are looking for. And more importantly what is the talent that you possess that is unique and will instantly help you in becoming a celeb on the Internet. This is extremely important if you are serious about being a celebrity. Most of the fame on Internet is about creating a personality that has a cult following. You need to have something that is both entertaining and informative. Becoming an Internet celebrity is not about being attention seeking but about being entertaining as well. Decide what you are good at; connecting with people, gauging the style trends before they are established trends, staying ahead of the curve, etc. You need to understand how you can create a niche with the talent you possess. Once you know what is going to make you famous, you will also reach a logical conclusion about how you want to be famous. As a socialite, a techie, an activist, a gossip blogger, every and any of these things could give you the fame you are looking for. This is the first step towards becoming an Internet celeb.

Next you need to figure out how you can become someone whom people look up to. This is where case studies come into play. Study famous Internet celebs and see how they became famous on the Internet. Choose from the lives of Julia Allison, Perez Hilton, Kyle MacDonald, and other such people who have used the Internet well enough to become celebrities in their own right. Once you know what path your favorite Internet celebrity used to gather his or her following, your task becomes much simpler.

So what's next in your road to world fame? The actual process of doing something. Post entertaining videos on YouTube, blog about things that actually will have people flocking your blog, tweet hilarious and witty stuff, etc. The best picks for a blog - fashion, gossip, movies, food, money. You will need to come up with a hook that makes your blog different from the rest of the information out there in the world. If you really want to become a celebrity on the Internet, then remember that the fame will be either instantaneous like Chris Crocker who got four million views on his Leave Britney Alone video in just two days. Alternatively the fame will come after months of perseverance and self-promotion.

One of the crucial steps to becoming an Internet celebrity is to promote yourself as much as you can. Publicity is key and without proper promotion your fame is going to flounder. Post about yourself everywhere, every social networking and micro-blogging site that exists like Facebook and Twitter and every video sharing site there is. Remember that the brand is you and you need to sell it as well as you can. Look for free web pages which will allow you to upload the work that is going to make you famous. You need to network well and try to get mentions on other blogs and profiles. This will only increase the traffic to your page and increase your popularity.

快樂的迷思

Myths About Happiness We Need to Stop Believing     psychologytoday

1. "I’ll Be Happy When I’m Married to the Right Person"

One of the most pervasive happiness myths is the notion that we’ll be happy when we find that perfect romantic partner—when we say “I do.” The false promise is not that marriage won’t make us happy. For the great majority of individuals, it will. The problem is that marriage—even when initially perfectly satisfying—will not make us as intensely happy (or for as long) as we believe it will. Indeed, studies show that the happiness boost from marriage lasts an average of only two years. Unfortunately, when those two years are up and fulfilling our goal to find the idea partner hasn’t made us as happy as we expected.

2. "I Need a Partner to Be Happy"

Many of us are positive that not having a partner would make us miserable forever. However, multiple studies show that single people are no less happy than married ones, and that singles have been found to enjoy great happiness and meaning in other relationships and pursuits. Unfortunately, believing in this myth may be toxic: Not recognizing the power of resilience and the rewards of singlehood (such as more time to spend with friends or engaging in solo projects and adventures) may lead us to settle for a poor romantic match.

3. "Landing My Dream Job Will Make Me Happy"

At the root of this happiness myth is the misconception that, although we’re not happy now, we’ll surely be happy when land that dream job. We encounter a problem, however, when acquiring that seemingly perfect job doesn’t make us as happy as we expected and when that happiness is ever so brief. What explains this unwelcome experience is the inexorable process of hedonic adaptation—namely, the fact that human beings have the remarkable capacity to grow habituated or inured to most life changes. Unfortunately, if we are convinced that a certain kind of job would make us happy (and it doesn’t), then misunderstanding the power of hedonic adaptation may compel us to jettison perfectly good careers.

4. "I’ll Be Happy When I’m Rich and Successful"

Many of us fervently believe that, if we’re not happy now, we’ll be happy when we’ve finally made it—when we have reached a certain level of prosperity and success. However, when that happiness proves elusive or short-lived, we weather mixed emotions, letdown, and even depression. When we’ve achieved—at least on paper—much of what we have always wanted to achieve, life can become dull and even empty. There is little around the corner to look forward to. Many prosperous and successful individuals don’t understand this natural process of adaptation, and may come to the conclusion that they need even more money to be truly happy. They do not realize that the key to buying happiness is not in how successful we are, but perhaps what we do with our success; it’s not how high our income is, but how we allocate it.

Read More 看完整內容

週二(12/18)1.琉球食物 活到100歲 2.情商

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

琉球食物 活到100歲

The Okinawa diet – could it help you live to 100?

Michael Booth   theguardian

Can you eat your way to a century? I am not referring to test cricketers, I'm talking about the Japanese diet. Or the Sardinian diet. Or the Ikarian diet. Or any one of half a dozen regional, usually traditional, ways of eating that have been credited with keeping an improbable proportion of their populations alive beyond the age of 100.

Last week, the oldest man ever on record, Jiroemon Kimura, from Kyotango near Kyoto, passed away at the age of 116. His death, and the fact that the new record holder, 115-year-old Misao Okawa, is from Osaka, reminded us that the Japanese know a trick or two when it comes to living beyond 100. According to the UN they have the greatest proportion of centenarians in the world – and a great deal of that knowhow concerns diet.

I have long taken an interest in how I might eat myself to old age. I visited the southern Japanese Okinawa islands whose population is said to include the largest proportion of centenarians in the country and met with some of them in what is supposedly the village with the oldest demographic in the world, Ogimi, little more than a dirt street lined with small houses, home to more than a dozen centenarians. Old folk tended vegetable patches or sat on porches watching a funeral procession go by. My family and I dined on rice and tofu, bamboo shoots, seaweed, pickles, small cubes of braised pork belly and a little cake at the local "longevity cafe" beneath flowering dragon fruit plants. Butterflies the size of dinner plates fluttered by and my youngest son asked if there was a KFC.

The next day I interviewed American gerontologist, Dr Craig Willcox, who has spent many years investigating Okinawan longevity and co-wrote a book, The Okinawa Program, outlining his findings (recommending that we "Eat as low down the food chain as possible" long before Michael Pollan's similarly veg-centric entreaty).

Willcox summarised the benefits of the local diet: "The Okinawans have a low risk of arteriosclerosis and stomach cancer, a very low risk of hormone-dependent cancers, such as breast and prostate cancer. They eat three servings of fish a week, on average ... plenty of whole grains, vegetables and soy products too, more tofu and more konbu seaweed than anyone else in the world, as well as squid and octopus, which are rich in taurine – that could lower cholesterol and blood pressure."

Okinawa's indigenous vegetables were particularly interesting: their purple sweet potatoes are rich in flavonoids, carotenoids, vitamin E and lycopene, and the local bitter cucumbers, or "goya", have been shown to lower blood sugar in diabetics. Like most of us, I am familiar with mainstream dietary advice – eat less sugar, salt and saturated fat, cut down on the cronuts and so on – but I much prefer the idea of discovering little-known shortcuts to longevity; I'm more of a "silver bullet" kind of guy. With this in mind, over a lunch of traditional goya chanpuru – bitter cucumber, stir-fried with tofu, egg and pork – in a restaurant that was little more than a tumbledown hut close to his campus, I asked Willcox which elements of the Okinawan diet he had introduced to his life. Turmeric and jasmine tea, he said; both potentially ward off cancer. Needless to say, both now feature in my morning ritual.

情商

Skillful Ways You Can Learn To Enhance Your Emotional Intelligence

Katherine Eion

Recognize and Manage Stress

There is no doubt that life is stressful. How you manage stress has a direct impact on emotional intelligence. Enhancing time-management skills may be one area where stress can be reduced. Prioritize tasks and learn how to politely refuse requests that are time-consuming but not beneficial. For example, take time to help out a friend but leave the dishes for later. Make and act on those decisions that are best for you. Don’t spend time worrying about what others would do or what others think or believe about you. Take a walk to soothe and clear a mind cluttered with emotions.

Develop An Open Mind

Learn to at least listen to the other side of an argument. Listening does not necessarily mean agreement. Be eager to learn and enhance your own natural intellectual curiosity. These tips help you to grow emotionally and intellectually. A means to understanding and getting along with others is in refusing to always be right; after all, no one is ever right all the time. You will also develop a means of dealing with conflict with confidence and poise. Frequently listen to debates, political and otherwise, on television and radio.

Develop Extrovert and Empathetic Tendencies

Empathy is the ability to understand another’s reactions and emotions in a given situation. This important skill is developed through thinking about how others are being treated. Refuse to be isolated. Volunteering skills and getting to know people can help you develop extroversion. Through getting involved with others, you become a person who is selfless and helpful. Development of these tendencies make you a better person, more skilled toward benefiting and helping others. This does not mean allowing others to simply use or walk all over you. Rather, you become an individual willing to set boundaries and happily engage in social interactions.

Be Analytical and Responsive

Think about how a decision will impact your life. Completely weigh options before acting. Be pro-active in decision-making. This is where a creative and imaginative mind serve you well. Consider the impact of hypothetical situations, such as changing jobs, getting involved in a new relationship, or moving. The consideration of a pretend scenario impacts the way a life changing situation can and will be addressed. Form goals, and write down short and long-term goals and the steps toward their ultimate achievement.

Read More 看完整內容

周六(12/15)1.學英文的好處2.英文學習方法 下午4:00-6:00

公告:
(10周年慶 於12月15日potluck party
下午6:00 歡迎您來免費用餐
出席者 請自行帶一份食物 現場小贈品分發)

***  (今日歡迎來聊聊 學英文心得 10周年慶 無收場地費)

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    星期六 聚會時間為下午4:00-6:00

 學英文的好處

Major Benefits of Learning English

Andrew Ward

1. Keeps Your Brain Sharp

Learning any language keeps your brain active and challenged. In fact, your brain changes electrical activity and size when learning a new language. No matter what age you start at, there are benefits for learning a new language. When you decide to learn English, you give yourself an extra rigorous workout due to its complicated nature. 

English is a combination of several origins like Germanic, Latin, and French. Speakers with these native tongues will have some advantage learning. Meanwhile, speakers from areas like Japan could find themselves going through mental hurdles to understand and master mostly unfamiliar sounds. Additionally, with spellings of words changing throughout the English speaking world, it’s quite difficult to get the correct pronunciation of words. If you don’t believe us, just go ask an American and an English person to say ‘aluminum.’

So, if you’re looking to develop more mental muscle, English is an excellent choice.

2. Boosts Your Employment Potential 

The world may not have a global language, but English is the default option for countless forms of communication across the globe. That’s why one of the benefits of learning English is that it significantly boosts your hiring potential. Not only is it an appealing credential on your resume, but it’s also statistically proven to increase your hiring potential.

3. One of the Best Languages to Learn For Travel

If you think English can only take you to places like the U.S., U.K., and Canada, we’ve got some great news: There are over 50 English-speaking countries around the world. And that doesn’t count for all over the world. In many cities, particularly in Europe, English is almost an unofficial second language where expats and tourists make up a significant portion of the community. Even in places like China where a few million out of the country’s 1.3 billion speak the language you run a good chance of meeting English speakers in its cities.

   

4 Become a Better Writer

One of the best ways to understand a new language is to write. The more that you write, the more exposure to the new language you receive. This helps your book comprehension and eventually your creativity.

In a classroom setting, writing helps drive in the fundamentals of a new language. Think back to your early education days. How often were you writing your alphabet and basic sentences? The same goes for when learning as an adult. In turn, this regular effort will help you take those simple words and build your knowledge out. Simple words will turn into more complex and soon you will have the descriptive words needed to become a creative writer.

Much like becoming a musician, you won’t understand your tool until you try it out for hours on end. The same goes for English. Start writing today, see the benefits soon.

  

英文學習方法

How to Learn English  wikihow

    Speak a little English every day. The absolute best way to learn any new language is just to speak it. It doesn't matter if you only know five English words or if you're practically fluent -- speaking English with another person is the fastest, most effective method of improving.

        Don't wait until you "feel more comfortable" speaking in English -- you probably won't reach that level for a long time, so push yourself outside of your comfort zone and start speaking English today. You' ll be amazed at how quickly your language skills improve.

        Find a native English speaker who is willing to spend some time speaking English with you -- you may be able to offer them a language exchange, where they spend 30 minutes speaking English with you and you spend 30 minutes speaking your native language with them.

        If you live in an English-speaking country, you can practice by starting simple conversations with the people you meet, whether it's saying "hello" to a shopkeeper or asking a stranger for directions.

    Expand your vocabulary and use idiomatic phrases. The wider your vocabulary and the more English phrases you learn, the easier speaking English will become.

        Again, spending time with native English speakers will help you to pick up on common vocabulary and phrases in a natural way. Although reading, watching English TV and listening to the news is also beneficial.

        Once you have learned a new word or phrase, you should make an effort to use it in a sentence -- this is the best way to commit it to memory.

        Another easy way to commit new words to memory is to make labels for everyday household items and stick them around your house or apartment. Then every time you use the kettle or look in the mirror, you will see the English word for these items staring back at you.

        You should also start a notebook of idiomatic phrases that English speakers use all the time. Some examples include "it's raining cats and dogs" (raining heavily), to be on "cloud nine" (to be very happy) or saying something is a "piece of cake" (when something is very easy). Sprinkling these kinds of phrases into your conversation will bring your level of English up several notches.

     Listen to English radio or podcasts. One of the best ways to improve your English listening comprehension is to download English-language podcasts or radio apps on your phone or MP3 player.

        You should then make an effort to listen to the podcasts or radio shows for at least 30 minutes per day. Do it in the gym, on your commute to work, or while you're sitting at your computer.

        Make an effort to understand what's being said, don't just let the English wash over you. Even if you find it too fast, try to pick out key words and phrases to get a general idea of what the conversation is about.

        If you can, make a note of any words or phrases that you don't understand and look up the translation afterwards. Then listen to the podcast or show again to hear the new words or phrases in context.

    Watch English movies and TV shows. Another fun way to improve your listening comprehension is to watch English movies and TV shows.

        Try to pick movies or TV shows that you will enjoy -- this will make the exercise feel like less of a chore. If possible, choose movies or shows that you are already familiar with, such as children's cartoons or blockbuster films. If you already know the basic story you will find the language much easier to pick up on.

        However, you should avoid watching movies or television shows with subtitles in your native language -- they will only distract you and make you less inclined to focus on understanding the English, which is the whole point of the exercise.

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週四 (12/20)1.如何成為網紅? 2.快樂的迷思

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

如何成為網紅?

How to Become an Internet Celebrity

techspirited

First and foremost decide on what kind of fame you are looking for. And more importantly what is the talent that you possess that is unique and will instantly help you in becoming a celeb on the Internet. This is extremely important if you are serious about being a celebrity. Most of the fame on Internet is about creating a personality that has a cult following. You need to have something that is both entertaining and informative. Becoming an Internet celebrity is not about being attention seeking but about being entertaining as well. Decide what you are good at; connecting with people, gauging the style trends before they are established trends, staying ahead of the curve, etc. You need to understand how you can create a niche with the talent you possess. Once you know what is going to make you famous, you will also reach a logical conclusion about how you want to be famous. As a socialite, a techie, an activist, a gossip blogger, every and any of these things could give you the fame you are looking for. This is the first step towards becoming an Internet celeb.

Next you need to figure out how you can become someone whom people look up to. This is where case studies come into play. Study famous Internet celebs and see how they became famous on the Internet. Choose from the lives of Julia Allison, Perez Hilton, Kyle MacDonald, and other such people who have used the Internet well enough to become celebrities in their own right. Once you know what path your favorite Internet celebrity used to gather his or her following, your task becomes much simpler.

So what's next in your road to world fame? The actual process of doing something. Post entertaining videos on YouTube, blog about things that actually will have people flocking your blog, tweet hilarious and witty stuff, etc. The best picks for a blog - fashion, gossip, movies, food, money. You will need to come up with a hook that makes your blog different from the rest of the information out there in the world. If you really want to become a celebrity on the Internet, then remember that the fame will be either instantaneous like Chris Crocker who got four million views on his Leave Britney Alone video in just two days. Alternatively the fame will come after months of perseverance and self-promotion.

One of the crucial steps to becoming an Internet celebrity is to promote yourself as much as you can. Publicity is key and without proper promotion your fame is going to flounder. Post about yourself everywhere, every social networking and micro-blogging site that exists like Facebook and Twitter and every video sharing site there is. Remember that the brand is you and you need to sell it as well as you can. Look for free web pages which will allow you to upload the work that is going to make you famous. You need to network well and try to get mentions on other blogs and profiles. This will only increase the traffic to your page and increase your popularity.

快樂的迷思

Myths About Happiness We Need to Stop Believing     psychologytoday

1. "I’ll Be Happy When I’m Married to the Right Person"

One of the most pervasive happiness myths is the notion that we’ll be happy when we find that perfect romantic partner—when we say “I do.” The false promise is not that marriage won’t make us happy. For the great majority of individuals, it will. The problem is that marriage—even when initially perfectly satisfying—will not make us as intensely happy (or for as long) as we believe it will. Indeed, studies show that the happiness boost from marriage lasts an average of only two years. Unfortunately, when those two years are up and fulfilling our goal to find the idea partner hasn’t made us as happy as we expected.

2. "I Need a Partner to Be Happy"

Many of us are positive that not having a partner would make us miserable forever. However, multiple studies show that single people are no less happy than married ones, and that singles have been found to enjoy great happiness and meaning in other relationships and pursuits. Unfortunately, believing in this myth may be toxic: Not recognizing the power of resilience and the rewards of singlehood (such as more time to spend with friends or engaging in solo projects and adventures) may lead us to settle for a poor romantic match.

3. "Landing My Dream Job Will Make Me Happy"

At the root of this happiness myth is the misconception that, although we’re not happy now, we’ll surely be happy when land that dream job. We encounter a problem, however, when acquiring that seemingly perfect job doesn’t make us as happy as we expected and when that happiness is ever so brief. What explains this unwelcome experience is the inexorable process of hedonic adaptation—namely, the fact that human beings have the remarkable capacity to grow habituated or inured to most life changes. Unfortunately, if we are convinced that a certain kind of job would make us happy (and it doesn’t), then misunderstanding the power of hedonic adaptation may compel us to jettison perfectly good careers.

4. "I’ll Be Happy When I’m Rich and Successful"

Many of us fervently believe that, if we’re not happy now, we’ll be happy when we’ve finally made it—when we have reached a certain level of prosperity and success. However, when that happiness proves elusive or short-lived, we weather mixed emotions, letdown, and even depression. When we’ve achieved—at least on paper—much of what we have always wanted to achieve, life can become dull and even empty. There is little around the corner to look forward to. Many prosperous and successful individuals don’t understand this natural process of adaptation, and may come to the conclusion that they need even more money to be truly happy. They do not realize that the key to buying happiness is not in how successful we are, but perhaps what we do with our success; it’s not how high our income is, but how we allocate it.

Read More 看完整內容

週二(12/11)1.無車日2.住台北較長壽

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

無車日

World Car Free Day  wiki

World Car Free Day, which is celebrated on September 22, encourages motorists to give up their cars for a day. Organized events are held in some cities and countries. According to The Washington Post, the event "promotes improvement of mass transit, cycling and walking, and the development of communities where jobs are closer to home and where shopping is within walking distance". Studies showed that for short trips in cities, one can reach more quickly using a bicycle rather than using a car.

The events, which vary by location, give motorists and commuters an idea of their locality with fewer cars. While projects along these lines had taken place from time to time on an ad hoc basis starting with the 1973 oil crisis, it was only in October 1994 that a structured call for such projects was issued in a keynote speech by Eric Britton at the International Ciudades Accessibles (Accessible Cities) Conference held in Toledo (Spain).[3]

Within two years the first Days were organized in Reykjavík (Iceland), Bath (United Kingdom) and La Rochelle (France), and the informal World Car Free Days Consortium was organized in 1995 to support Car-Free Days worldwide. The first national campaign was inaugurated in Britain by the Environmental Transport Association in 1997, the French followed suit in 1998 as In town, without my car! and was established as a Europe-wide initiative by the European Commission in 2000. In the same year the Commission enlarged the program to a full European Mobility Week which now is the major focus of the Commission, with the Car-Free Day part of a greater new mobility whole. Also in 2000, car free days went global with a World Carfree Day program launched by Carbusters, now World Carfree Network, and in the same year the Earth Car Free Day collaborative program of the Earth Day Network and the World Car Free Days collaborative.

While considerable momentum has been achieved in terms of media coverage, these events turn out to be difficult to organize to achieve real success (perhaps requiring significant reorganization of the host city's transportation arrangement) and even a decade later there is considerable uncertainty about the usefulness of this approach. Broad public support and commitment to change is needed for successful implementation. By some counts by advocates (disputed), more than a thousand cities worldwide organized “Days” during 2005.

Currently Bogotá holds the world's largest car-free weekday event covering the entire city. The first car-free day was held in February 2000 and became institutionalised through a public referendum.

In September 2007, Jakarta, the capital city of Indonesia, held its first Car-Free Day that closed the main avenue of the city from cars and invited local pedestrian to exercise and having their activities on the streets that normally full of cars and traffic. Along the road from the Senayan traffic circle on Jalan Sudirman, South Jakarta, to the Selamat Datang Monument at the Hotel Indonesia traffic circle on Jalan Thamrin, all the way north to National Monument Central Jakarta, cars are cleared out for pedestrians.[5] Since May 2012 Car-Free Day in Jakarta is held every Sunday. It is held on the main avenues of the city, Jalan Sudirman and Jalan Thamrin, from Senayan area to Monas (Monumen Nasional), from 6 AM to 11 AM.

  

住台北較長壽

Life expectancy in Taiwan/ Taipei residents had the longest average life expectancy

CNA

Taipei, Sept. 21 (CNA) Men and women in Taiwan can expect to live longer than ever before, according to the latest life expectancy figures released by the Ministry of the Interior (MOI) on Friday.

Life expectancy in Taiwan hit a new high of 80.4 for the population as a whole in 2017, with males and females averaging record life spans of 77.3 years and 83.7 years, respectively, the MOI numbers showed.

The latest life expectancy figure returned to its long-term growth trend after dipping in 2016 to 80 from 80.2 in 2015.

Life spans in Taiwan have risen steadily for decades, and the record set in 2017, which was up from 78.4 in 2007, reflects the improvement in the country's medical care, greater public awareness of food safety issues, and the growing popularity of physical exercise, the ministry said.

The average life expectancies of both Taiwan's males and females are higher than the world average, but lower than in such countries as Japan, Spain and Singapore, the ministry said.

Among Taiwan's six biggest metropolitan areas, Taipei residents had the longest average life expectancy of 83.6 in 2017, followed by 81.17 in New Taipei, 80.75 in Taoyuan, 80.34 in Taichung, 79.73 in Tainan and 79.08 in Kaohsiung, MOI figures showed.

In Taiwan's 16 other cities and counties, residents of Hsinchu City had the highest life expectancy at 80.9 years, while Taitung County had the lowest at 75.5.

A total of 172,028 people died in Taiwan in 2017, down 801 from 2016. That translated to a crude death rate of 7.3 per 1,000, according to the ministry.

The crude death rate refers to the number of deaths occurring throughout a year per every 1,000 people in a country.

Read More 看完整內容

周六(12/8)1.幽默與吵架2.咖啡與健康 下午4:00-6:00

公告:
(10周年慶 於12月15日potluck party
下午6:00 歡迎您來免費用餐
出席者 請自行帶一份食物 現場小贈品分發)

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    星期六 聚會時間為下午4:00-6:00

幽默與吵架

Is Humor OK to Use When You're Fighting?   psychologytoday

People love funny people.  A good sense of humor is an incredibly attractive quality, one of the most important qualities that people look for during relationship initiation (Buss, 1998). But once a relationship is established, how does humor affect relationship quality? In particular, how does humor work during conflict?

Couples argue. From serious matters to less serious concerns, we fight about finances, what TV show to watch, loyalty, who ate the last ice cream sandwich.. it's natural to have couple conflict.

So can humor help, if well-timed and well-received? That witty comment might suddenly dissolve tension and help put the conversation into perspective. But in the throes of a heated argument, just imagine the effects of an ill-timed joke: Instead of diffusing the situation, it could ignite anger and escalate the conflict.

Winterheld and colleagues (2013) recently investigated how humor operates during romantic relationship conflict by inviting couples into the lab to discuss either a serious or trivial “unresolved relationship problem.” The researchers videotaped the conflict discussion and coded participants’ verbal statements and non-verbal behaviors for attempts at humor, distress, anger, and satisfaction with the outcome of the conversation. Prior to the conflict discussion, the researchers also surveyed each member of the couple individually in order to assess some of their impressions of their relationship and to measure some personality characteristics.

To learn from their findings, we first need to appreciate that humor can be subdivided into four styles (Martin, Puhlik-Doris, Larsen, Gray, & Weir, 2003). The first two styles, affilitative humor and self-enhancing humor, are both positive humor styles. The former (affiliative) involves using wit, inside-jokes, or amusing comments to bring people together or ease tensions, the latter (self-enhancing) involves having a positive view of the world and using humor to gain perspective. The other two humor styles are both negative styles: aggressive humor and self-defeating humor. Martin and colleagues (2003) identify aggressive humor as sarcasm, humor that pokes fun, or biting jokes that are funny at the expense of others. In self-defeating humor, the butt of the joke becomes the self. People who use self-defeating humor might try to ingratiate themselves to others by making fun of themselves or by acting foolishly.

Are some humor styles more useful in conflicts than others? Yes, but it often depends on the nature of the conflict and aspects about the partner (Winterheld et al., 2013). In Winterheld and colleagues’ study, when individuals’ partners were emotionally distraught (i.e., highly distressed) those individuals appeared to be sensitive to their partners’ underlying attachment tendencies when choosing what type of humor to use: The more anxious the partner, the more these individuals opted for that soothing, benign style of affilitative humor.  his was much more useful than other styles of humor. Even in conflict, people recognize that highly anxious partners, when distressed, need the comfort and reassurance that affiliative humor provides. Less anxious people, on the other hand, may be better able to cope in the absence of affiliative humor.

 

咖啡與健康

The surprising health benefits of coffee   mayoclinic

Coffee has been around for a long time and blamed for many ills — from stunting your growth to causing heart disease — but newer research shows that it may actually have health benefits.

Recent studies have generally found no connection between coffee and an increased risk of heart disease or cancer.

In fact, some studies have found an association between coffee consumption and decreased overall mortality and possibly cardiovascular mortality, although this may not be true in younger people who drink large amounts of coffee.

Why the apparent reversal in the thinking about coffee? Earlier studies didn't always take into account that known high-risk behaviors, such as smoking and physical inactivity, tended to be more common among heavy coffee drinkers.

Studies have shown that coffee may have health benefits, including protecting against Parkinson's disease, type 2 diabetes and liver disease, including liver cancer. Coffee also appears to improve cognitive function and decrease the risk of depression.

However, the research appears to bear out some risks. High consumption of unfiltered coffee (boiled or espresso) has been associated with mild elevations in cholesterol levels.

In addition, some studies found that two or more cups of coffee a day can increase the risk of heart disease in people with a specific — and fairly common — genetic mutation that slows the breakdown of caffeine in the body. So, how quickly you metabolize coffee may affect your health risk.

Although coffee may have fewer risks compared with benefits, keep in mind that other beverages, such as milk and some fruit juices, contain nutrients that coffee doesn't. Also, adding cream and sugar to your coffee adds fat and calories — up to hundreds of calories in some cases.

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