周六(5/19)1.為他人做些好事2.情感關係與成功 4:00-6:00

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮

左轉       聚會時間 下午4:00--6:00

為他人做些好事

How to Do Do a Little Good for Others?

    1

    Find ways to help life flourish and grow. Helping people to arise and maintain good qualities within themselves and their lives is very rewarding of itself. Sometimes a person is just lacking a quality that is really needed in their life right now such as courage or self worth and by helping them to arise It and teaching them how to maintain it you see them succeed and better their own lives. It is a worthwhile thing to do.

    2

    Create things for people. The great thing about creating things for people is that it is not about the money and when you have compassionate motivation, you begin to see your skills develop and prosper as a consequence to the point that sometimes you are able to create things from nothing. Sometimes there can be some financial gain in doing so but for the most part it is just very enjoyable for everyone involved. Try creating a variety of things depending on the situation and what is required.

    3

    Offer to do chores for people. Sometimes people have small jobs that they need doing but just never get round to, perhaps your mother needs her light bulbs changed, or perhaps you can cut the neighbour’s lawn for him or her. Doing this sort of thing encourages good relations between people.

    4

    Set up a regular good deed. This is something that everybody needs to do when they can. If you are in some sort of routine with work or otherwise it is a great time to put this in place. The idea is to do something good in a recurring way. Something that would be included in this is perhaps bringing food for everyone at work or bringing something to your mother every week. Another thing you can do is make sure the graves of loved ones are kept tidy and respectful, or make sure your work’s lunchroom is clean and tidy. Getting into these sorts of habits is a great way to lend a hand.

    5

    Learn how to repair things. By learning how to repair things you open yourself to a variety of ways to help. Material things break all the time and sometimes all it takes is a skillful pair of hands to avoid having to get a new one. People are always grateful when you finish and it is a great feeling to see something you have repaired working or whole again

    6

    Share what you know. By sharing what you know you enlighten people to new things and help them with things they are struggling with. Teaching others skills only makes you more skillful and sharing your knowledge makes you more knowledgeable. People often appreciate you sharing what you know with them because they benefit from it. And so it becomes a good thing for everyone involved.

 

情感關係與成功

 Secrets to a Successful Relationship

Theresa E DiDonato Ph.D.

Recommit, everyday. When people think of love, the emotional components of passion and intimacy are often the first to come to mind, but commitment is actually the Number One predictor of relationship satisfaction, especially in long-term relationships (Acker & Davis, 1992). Commitment is a cognitive choice, a decision that individuals make to be in a relationship. Couples who renew their commitments everyday, in words and deed, are situating themselves nicely for a long-lasting partnership.

Be playful. Sure, adult life tends to emphasize productivity and seriousness, but sometimes it's about playing. Playful people take time to prioritize enjoyment, pleasure, amusement, and having fun, and such an orientation in romantic relationships is predictive of satisfaction (Proyer, 2014). This suggests the possibility that play could be an important dimension of a successful relationship.

Put work into the relationship. Back in the 1980s, relationship scholars identified relationship maintenance behaviors as critically important to the sustained health of a romantic partnership. Recent research supports the idea that individuals who actively work on their relationships help make those relationships happy and lasting (Ogolsky & Bowers, 2013). The specific kinds of behaviors that reliably predict relationship success include expressing positive emotions, being open, giving relational reassurances, using your social circle to support your relationship, and readily sharing the work and responsibilities that come with a long-term relationship.

If it's not important, let it go. In a recent study, researchers asked a sample of divorcees why their marriages failed. Participants cited frequent arguing as a major contributor, second only to infidelity (Scott, Rhoades, Stanley, Allen, & Markman, 2013). They described how an argument might start around something minor and then escalate into a major fight. Importantly, these arguments were not productive, supportive, or calm; rather, people recalled significant negative emotions. Finding ways to reduce the frequency of conflict, by letting go of the little things, could add more happiness to a relationship. If conflict does occur, how a couple manages it may be predictive of their relationship success.

When there is conflict, talk it out. Recent research suggests that couples benefit from being flexible in how they respond to conflicts (Overall & McNulty, 2017). When couples are navigating serious conflicts, are secure in their relationship, and have the ability to adapt their behaviors, being direct and oppositional can actually help more than other approaches; however, a more cooperative, affectionate approach may be the best strategy when someone tends to get defensive or when the conflict is minor. In other words, there's no "one size fits all" strategy: Successful couples adapt their approach to a specific conflict as a function of its broader context.

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週二(5/15)1.飢餓與生氣/新單字2.七秒決定印象

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

飢餓與生氣/新單字

Feeling Hangry Is a Real Thing

Julia Naftulin September  health.com

We asked an expert to explain why you get so cranky before a late lunch.

Ever notice how when your tummy is rumbling, you're more likely to lash out at unsuspecting loved ones or even innocent bystanders? This sudden, irrational rage is often referred to as "hanger" (a combo of hunger and anger) and experts say it is a very real thing.

"When we do not eat, blood sugar goes low," explains Deena Adimoolam, MD, an assistant professor in the Division of Endocrinology, Diabetes, and Bone Disease at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai. When your blood sugar falls, the hormones cortisol and epinephrine are released in an attempt to raise it back to normal. But those hormones also happen to lead to irritability, which explains why you're so crabby when you skip breakfast.

Another hormone, called Neuropeptide Y, plays a role in hanger too, adds Dr. Adimoolam. Neuropeptide Y helps create a hungry feeling when your body needs more food—and it's also linked to aggression.

Researchers have documented the hangry phenomenon in relationships: A study from Ohio State University on married couples found that the lower the participants' blood sugar level, the angrier and more aggressive they felt toward their partners.

RELATED: 17 High-Protein Snacks You Can Eat on the Go

So when, exactly, does hanger kick in between meals? "It varies by every individual," says Dr. Adimoolam. "But the lower your blood sugar goes, the hangrier you are. It's our body's defense mechanism to get food ASAP." The tricky part is, hangry people tend crave cookies, pastries, chocolate, or candy, she says. These sugary snacks will raise your blood sugar quickly. But that spike inevitably leads to another crash—and you'll be acting like a crankpot all over again.

So what's a girl to do when hanger strikes? "Carry healthy snacks with you—like vegetables, fruit, and yogurt—so that when you are hungry [they] will hold you over until the next meal," says Dr. Adimoolam. Eating three full meals a day will also help curb intense hunger, and the freakouts that come with it. (Sign up for our 21-Day Healthy Lunch Challenge to get recipes for balanced, protein-packed midday meals that will keep you full well into the P.M.!)

And if hanger sneaks up on you still, try to avoid any mentally or emotionally taxing tasks until you've had a chance to refuel, says Dr. Adimoolam. "Get in a meal and your mind will be in a much better place."

七秒決定印象

Seven Seconds to Make a First Impression

Carol Kinsey Goman  forbes.com

You meet a business acquaintance for the first time - it could be your new boss, a recent addition to your team, or a potential client you want to sign up.

The moment that stranger sees you, his or her brain makes a thousand computations: Are you someone to approach or to avoid? Are you friend or foe? Do you have status and authority? Are you trustworthy, competent, likeable, confident?

And these computations are made at lightning speed -- making major decisions about one another in the first seven seconds of meeting.

In business interactions, first impressions are crucial. While you can’t stop people from making snap decisions – the human brain is hardwired in this way as a prehistoric survival mechanism – you can understand how to make those decisions work in your favor.

First impressions are more heavily influenced by nonverbal cues than verbal cues. In fact, studies have found that nonverbal cues have over four times the impact on the impression you make than anything you say.

Here are seven nonverbal ways to make a positive first impression:

1. Adjust your attitude. People pick up your attitude instantly. Before you turn to greet someone, or enter the boardroom, or step onstage to make a presentation, think about the situation and make a conscious choice about the attitude you want to embody.

2. Straighten your posture. Status and power are nonverbally conveyed by height and space. Standing tall, pulling your shoulders back, and holding your head straight are all signals of confidence and competence.

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周六(5/12)1.反轉第一印象 2.身體姿勢與成功 4:00-6:00

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

新埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮

左轉       聚會時間 下午4:00--6:00

反轉第一印象

Ways to Reverse a Bad First Impression   realsimple.com

My research has shown that women and men tend to orient their bodies differently when talking to each other. Women typically face one another and look steadily at each other's faces; they feel like this shows that they're friendly. But when faced directly, men tend to feel that they're being closed in on. Men generally sit at angles or even parallel to each other, only occasionally glancing at each other's faces, which may seem rude to women. If you sense that you've made a bad impression with someone of the opposite gender, engage him differently the next time: Change the way you're positioned and notice whether you're maintaining your gaze or looking at him only now and then—it may alter how he thinks of you.

Let Your Guard Down

Most of the people I advise lead very busy work lives, so they are often preoccupied. I've had clients brush off an important person or use a brusque tone with someone they've just met just because they were in a hurry. I encourage clients to proactively follow up and say to the person they rubbed the wrong way, "I was distracted because of a looming deadline. I'm sorry about our last run-in, and I would love to grab a coffee. I want you to know how happy I am to meet you." People appreciate the authenticity of an apology and the personalized attention that comes with it.

Q:

How to give a good first impression?

How to reverse a bad first impression?

Why are first impressions so important?

How to change about your popularity?

How to impress a girl/a guy?

How to be friendly? 

 

身體姿勢與成功

Good Posture: Its Importance, Benefits, and How-To

Brett and Kate McKay  artofmanliness.com

Improves bodily alignment. When you stand and sit with your body properly aligned, all your organs can function as intended. This includes your stomach, which is why good posture may improve digestion.

Eliminates back and neck pain. When you have proper posture, your bones and spine can easily and efficiently balance and support your body’s weight. When you have improper posture, muscles, tendons, and ligaments have to constantly work to support that same weight. This extra, inefficient effort can lead to back and neck pain as well as tension headaches. Focusing on improving your posture can go a long way to remedying these problems.

Improves breathing. To work efficiently, your lungs need room to expand in your chest. When you’re slumped over, your rib cage collapses a bit, leaving less room for your lungs to open, which in turn causes inefficient breathing.

Improves memory and learning. Recent research has shown there may be a connection between good posture and memory retention when learning new things. Why? It’s theorized that since good posture enhances your breathing, it allows you to take in more oxygen, and when you take in more oxygen, your cognition improves. (Fast fact: your brain uses about 25% of all the oxygen in your body.)

Makes you look taller and slimmer. Some poor posture positions cause your belly to protrude, giving you a “beer belly” profile. And slumping over makes you appear shorter than you are. Standing up straight will correct these issues and improve your appearance.

Makes you look confident and powerful. When we stand in an upright position, people perceive us as having high status. There are a few reasons why:

First, as we discussed in our series on the nature of status, height and physique are two embodied status markers humans use to size each other up. Research shows that taller, fitter-looking men are not only judged to be more attractive by the opposite sex, they also earn more over their lifetime than shorter and overweight men. While you can’t do much about the height that God has given you, you can make the most of what you’ve got by standing up straight with proper posture.

Second, an open, upright stance is simply perceived as more authoritative and dominant. You see this even with animals. When chimps or dogs are submissive, they’ll bow their heads and make themselves look small. Dominant animals, on the other hand, stand up straight and take up more room. An upright posture is a “power pose” that conveys confidence and status to other humans.

Finally, good posture makes your seem more trustworthy. There’s a reason being “upright” and “standing tall” are used to describe someone who’s virtuous and committed to their principles. Those who slump seem to be burdened by some weight — perhaps that of their faults and deceptions. Men who stand straight are thus perceived as open and honest.

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周四 (5/10) 1.如何跟生氣的人溝通?2.母親節 贈品?

板橋站區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

如何跟生氣的人溝通?

How to Calm an Angry Person

    Avoid a fight. When someone else is at a boiling point, getting equally angry is only going to make matters worse. Focus on keeping yourself calm, or else the situation might quickly spiral into an argument. This is not to say you should act completely unemotional, but try not to let your own feelings get too heated.

        A way to remain neutral is to let go of your own ego and not take things personally. It can be natural to respond to an angry person by defending yourself or your reputation, but it’s important to remember that someone who is very angry cannot be reasoned with until they have calmed down.

    Try not to get defensive. When someone’s so mad they can barely speak in a level tone, it’s easy to absorb that negativity and feel defensive. When you’re communicating with someone who is angry, realize that the anger is likely not about you. Separate the person’s emotions from your own so you can be there for the person without feeling the anger is directed toward you.

    Stay calm and quiet. If someone is yelling or venting, you can decide to let them vent to blow off steam, but the best thing for you to do is to remain quiet or to say nothing. If you do speak, keep a quiet level voice. If you remain quiet, try to keep a neutral facial expression and open body language. You remain in more control if you do not react to the “bait” of the person yelling.

      

 There is a difference between letting someone vent and being the victim of verbal abuse. If the person is berating you, calling you names, or directing unrelated anger towards you, you may want to make a statement such as, “I understand that you are frustrated and I would like to be here for you. But please do not take your anger out on me.”

    Apologize if you were in the wrong. If you did something to anger the person, maybe what they need is a heartfelt apology. Apologizing is not a sign of weakness. It shows that you care about the feelings of the other person.Reflect on the situation to see if you did something wrong, and if you did, say you’re sorry. Sometimes that’s all a person needs to hear to feel better about what happened.

     Show empathy.  Empathy can take the form of understanding another’s perspective, feeling distress at the plight of another person, and being able to relate to the emotions of another.[10] Showing empathy towards someone who is angry may take the form of showing that you have been listening to him and know what he is saying.

        To empathize with someone who is angry, try paraphrasing the source of their anger back to them. You might say, “So, you are saying that you feel angry because you think you have to take on all of the household responsibilities alone.”

        You may be inclined to say, “I understand how you feel,” but know that this can sometimes make someone more angry. They may believe that no one really knows how they feel.

  

母親節 贈品?

Taiwanese KMT councilor apologizes over using pet animals as Mother's Day giveaways

taiwannews

TAIPEI (Taiwan News) - How bizarre would the election campaign giveaways would be? A KMT Taoyuan County Councilor Jan Jiang-tsun (詹江村) was recently using live animals of hamster and guppy as "giveaways" in celebration of Mother's Day.

On early Wednesday, a netizen exposed the news on the country's largest online forum with the image of a "gift voucher" for hamster and guppy, with an exchange deadline set for May 31 this year, along with a campaign photo of Jan himself and the greeting line "Happy Mom Day." The news of the bizarre gift voucher was quickly spread on social media and by media coverage, resulting in overwhelming criticism against the councilor.

"What the hell was he thinking to use live animals as gifts in an election campaign," "this is so sick," "that's so wrong to use live animals as giveaways in the name of celebrating Mother's Day, whose nature is honoring the mother of the family and the maternal bonds, but now he is taking these animals away from their family..."

As the criticism spiraled out of control and even spilled over to his political party KMT, Jan on Wednesday apologized for the act and said that he will not make the same mistake again. In a Facebook live video, Jan admitted that giving these pet animals away as a gift was wrong, while saying he has been an advocate of pet adoption and has long sponsored adoption activities in Taoyuan. 

Jan did not explain how giving these live animals away has anything to do with his long-time pet adoption initiative.

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週二(5/8)1.笑與快樂2.限電節能/增加生育

板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)

埔捷運站1號出口 旁邊7-11巷子進入20公尺 看到夏朵美髮左轉    PM 7:00-9:30

笑與快樂

Smiling can trick your brain into happiness — and boost your health

nbcnews.com

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Ever had someone tell you to cheer up and smile? It’s probably not the most welcomed advice, especially when you’re feeling sick, tired or just plain down in the dumps. But there’s actually good reason to turn that frown upside down, corny as it sounds. Science has shown that the mere act of smiling can lift your mood, lower stress, boost your immune system and possibly even prolong your life.

It’s a pretty backwards idea, isn’t it? Happiness is what makes us smile; how can the reverse also be true? The fact is, as Dr. Isha Gupta a neurologist from IGEA Brain and Spine explains, a smile spurs a chemical reaction in the brain, releasing certain hormones including dopamine and serotonin. “Dopamine increases our feelings of happiness. Serotonin release is associated with reduced stress. Low levels of serotonin are associated with depression and aggression,” says Dr. Gupta. “Low levels of dopamine are also associated with depression.”

Fake It Till You Make It

In other words, smiling can trick your brain into believing you’re happy which can then spur actual feelings of happiness. But it doesn’t end there. Dr. Murray Grossan, an ENT-otolaryngologist in Los Angeles points to the science of psychoneuroimmunology (the study of how the brain is connected to the immune system), asserting that it has been shown “over and over again” that depression weakens your immune system, while happiness on the other hand has been shown to boost our body’s resistance.

“What’s crazy is that just the physical act of smiling can make a difference in building your immunity,” says Dr. Grossan. “When you smile, the brain sees the muscle [activity] and assumes that humor is happening.”

In a sense, the brain is a sucker for a grin. It doesn’t bother to sort out whether you’re smiling because you’re genuinely joyous, or because you’re just pretending.

“Even forcing a fake smile can legitimately reduce stress and lower your heart rate,” adds Dr. Sivan Finkel, a cosmetic dentist at NYC’s The Dental Parlour. “A study performed by a group at the University of Cardiff in Wales found that people who could not frown due to botox injections were happier on average than those who could frown.”

And there are plenty more studies out there to make you smile (or at least, serve as reference for why you should). Researchers at the University of Kansas published findings that smiling helps reduce the body’s response to stress and lower heart rate in tense situations; another study linked smiling to lower blood pressure, while yet another suggests that smiling leads to longevity.

Q:

Why smiling can trick your brain into happiness?

What are the ways to cheer up a friend?

What are the ways to find happiness in your life?

How to reduce stress?

What do you think this saying “smiling leads to longevity”?

How to have a sense of humor?

  

限電節能/增加生育

Lin Ching-yi calls for restricting power in Taiwan after 10 p.m. to save energy, raise birthrate

taiwannews.com.tw

DPP legislator Lin Ching-yi suggests restricting electricity after 10 p.m. will save energy and raise the birthrate

TAIPEI (Taiwan News) -- The Democratic Progressive Party (DPP) Legislator Lin Ching-yi (林靜儀), yesterday evening (May 2) suggested that power be restricted after 10 p.m. to help conserve energy and resolve the country's low birthrate.

The Facebook page called Citizens Miaokou (公民廟口-立委在做天在看) posted a video at 6:56 p.m. last night of a question and answer session in Taiwanese dialect and Mandarin with Lin and Environmental Protection Administration (EPA) chief Lee Ying-yuan (李應元). During the session, Lin suggested that power be limited after 10 p.m., people should go home from work, not to turn on the TV and lights and everyone should go to sleep early.

Lin reasoned that taking these steps would solve the energy problem and would also "solve the problem of fewer children." Laughing, probably at the latter comment about increasing the birthrate, Lee concurred with her suggestions.

Lin said that this would would lead to a more healthy lifestyle, with better sleep and the ability to wake up at 5 a.m. In response, Lee said, "I completely agree, lifestyle changes will conserve energy."

She went on to say that she asked that cable TV stations not play movies late at night, "otherwise everyone won't sleep at night as they watch reruns of movies, it's actually a waste of resources. Those old movies have been replayed hundreds of times."

Netizens reacted to her simplistic suggestions with sarcastic remarks:

"This is great, Lin Ching-yi is very wise brilliant and the workers are overwhelmed with gratitude. From this day forward, laborers will never have to be overworked again!"

"This is great, only she could thing of such a ingenious idea, everyone was drunk and you woke them up. Global warming has been solved. This is deserving of many Nobel Prizes."

Q:

What do you think the idea that restricting power in Taiwan after 10 p.m.?

How to save energy?

Do you think that birthrate raising relate to power cut?
What are the ways for raising birthrate?

Do married couples have to have children?

Why some couples that they don’t want to have children after marry?

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