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優秀的談話者
How to Be a Good Talker (Edited by Ashfaq Ahmad, Maluniu, Mountain
Dew)
Here are a`few steps on how to be successful through communicating
well.
1 Put forth an appropriate body presentation:
that is a "must" for a good talker. Are you convincing someone -- if
so, your words become more effective with a nice smile. You can not afford any
bad gesture or weak logic at that time. If you do not have a natural smile on
your face, then assume that, "I am playing a role in a particular kind of
movie or drama." You should act like a professional actor/actress would
do, by bringing the right gestures on your face and body for your situation. A
stony, seemingly uncaring face is boring, confusing and self-defeating.
2 Use well chosen words to make a good
sentence at the right place and exact time needed; well timed responses make it
work. It is only possible by reading the situation instantly, using your
automatic senses -- not like some autopilot, or robot, but being natural and
fitting. For this purpose, to read the situation, you should be a good
observer, or become a good observer/listener, and make a special effort to show
a good kind and degree of response.
3 Make brief breaks in your sentences. Pause,
momentarily where it seems natural. This means that you should give a little
time to the other to absorb the words of your sentence. Allow questions,
objections and remarks. Here once again you will need a strong observation
about the surroundings and the interests of the person to whom you are talking.
If you feel that he/she has little interest in your talk, then try to wind up
your topic or intermix with another topic and bend your perspective in a
connective manner.
4 Never unnecessarily confront someone
directly through your words, if he/she is wrong, or you feel them wrong. If you
do so, you may have lost the value of your sentences by inducing negative
feelings. Be kind to one another.
5 Regard the topic and your surroundings to
always choose the better type of physical contact. If you are discussing
business deals in an office or in some other rather formal places then just a
confident measure in your voice and smiling is enough to support your words, and
then an appropriate firm handshake, bowing if appropriate, on greeting and
parting may be welcome and impressive. But, if you are in a garden with someone
on a walk, then it may be good to walk hand in hand, if that is appropriate for
the persons involved.
6 To be an impressive and good talker avoid
too much explanation of each and every thing without a demand such as
"Tell me what you mean!" or a question like, "What do you
mean?" Over-doing your talk may bore, or insult the listener, lose the
person's attention and the value and importance of the matter which you are
discussing.
Questions:
1. How to be a good talker? How to speak
eloquently?
2. How to effectively persuade others?
Ways to successfully persuade and influence
others?
3. What is the importance of body language?
4. Do you think those leaders of
“protesting students” are good talkers?
Do you think Taiwanese politicians are good
talkers?
5. How to be a good negotiator?
6. How to make someone like and trust you? Ways
to build trust?
7. Ways to sell a product?
8. How to give a great speech? How to give
a good presentation?
好朋友們: 您有沒有想過「如果生命剩下幾天，什麼是您一定要完成的事呢？」
甚麼事? 您最想完成，而藏在心中，隨著一成不變的日子，日日流逝，而未完成呢?
歡迎來聊聊
Billy
Things
to do before you die By Josh
Lew
1. Set foot on each of the seven
continents. Antarctica might seem like a tough one, but here’s how. Once you’ve
reached all seven you can truly call yourself a world traveler.
2. Cross a country on a bicycle. A bicycle
tour takes some planning, but it beats being separated from a country though a passenger-side
window.
3. Ride something bigger than a horse.
Trekking through the jungle on the back of a two-story elephant will surely be
something you remember forever.
4. Live like a local for a month. The
experience of visiting native peoples will give you way more insight into
another way of life than two years hopping from one backpacker ghetto to the
next.
5. Climb one of the world’s Seven Summits.
Climbing mountains is not for the faint-hearted, but many people rank standing
atop one as one of the things to do before you die.
6. Dive with a whale shark. Swimming with these
gentle giants is among the most powerful wilderness experiences in the world.
7. Participate in a Carnival parade in Brazil.
You haven’t had a good night out until you’ve been to the biggest party in a
nation of big parties.
8. SCUBA the Great Barrier Reef. The
largest coral reef in the world is a must for dive enthusiasts. It is the
world’s most unique aquatic environment.
9. Buy a boat and learn to sail. Before the
Brothers Wright, everyone traveled by wind power. It’s still the most
sustainable way to travel there is.
10. Follow your food from field to table.
Most people in the world still eat what they have picked with their own hands.
Why not get back to these basics?
11. Bathe in the Ganges. What better way to
experience the spiritual heart of India?
12. Travel around the world. Sure, you
could do this without ever setting foot outside of planes and airports, but few
people ever truly traverse the entire globe. Round the world tickets are great
for budget-minded wanderers.
28. Spend 24 hours alone in the jungle.
13. Attend the Olympics. Whatever you say
about the commercialism of the Olympic Games, they are one of the biggest
events on the planet.
14. Stand at the North or South Pole.
15. Skydive. It is the ultimate thrill,
unless you add a wingsuit, and actually fly.
16. Bike the Pacific Coast Highway.
17. Shake hands with someone who has truly
changed a country.
面對生死大關 癌末一路玩到掛 聯合新聞網作者： 林維君
Questions:
1. Do you ever think of death or dying? Are
you afraid of death?
2. If this were the last day of your life,
how would you spend it?
“Things
to do before you die” which one you are interest most? Tell us why? Or any
special ideas?
Examples:
Climb one of the world’s seven summits/ Dive
with a whale shark/ Attend the Olympics/ Buy a boat and learn to sail/ Spend 24
hours alone in the jungle
3. If you died today, would you go to
heaven/hell?
4. If you need to write your will? What
contents of will on your will lists?
What things would be said if you were
dying?
5. If you died today, who would miss you?
6. Do you believe in the after-life?
7. Have anyone ever died and came back,
tell us any experiences?
8. How to Plan your funeral or memorial
service?
3年前在澳洲進修安寧療護與哀傷諮商時，訪談了喪夫的年輕護理師Sue。她的丈夫Sam是製酒師，43歲時診斷出大腸癌第四期後，雖有意積極治療，但對治療反應不佳，化療副作用讓他非常痛苦。與醫師促膝長談後，Sam決定只保留有助症狀控制的緩和性化療與放射線治療，定期回門診，盡量不住院。
Sam保的防癌險在他得知診斷時，便給了他一大筆理賠金。他與Sue討論後，決定拿著這筆錢去環遊世界，回診時間到了，就搭飛機回澳洲，治療告一段落，再繼續下一趟旅程。
我聽著Sue的敘述，非常吃驚，因為在台灣，保險理賠金大概會全部投入保健食品、自費藥物治療、看護費用或單人房的病房差額等，他們怎能這麼灑脫的捨棄能讓Sam延命的治療？Sue告訴我，她曾在癌症病房工作，了解癌症末期病人持續治療會發生的事；而Sam的父親與叔叔、表哥都是癌症患者，他曾協助照顧他們，親眼目睹過癌症病程進展到死亡的歷程。
在這樣的經驗背景下，夫妻倆決定捨棄頻繁住院治療可能延長的半年到一年的預估生命期，因為在癌症末期，雖然積極接受化療、標靶治療等，可以延長生命，但也表示這段時間會被疾病、治療囚禁在醫院，既然如此，他們寧可將最後的生命活得如煙火般，短暫而精采。
他們遵照醫師囑咐，規律返回門診接受症狀控制的治療，同時也幾乎完成了環遊世界的壯遊（可惜缺了台灣跟南極）。在Sam過世前一周，辦了盛大的慶生會，所有的親朋好友們都來參加，Sam一一與他們道別，並將愛妻交託給他的好友們。
Sue流著淚，嘴角卻微笑著告訴我，Sam過世前一天，他們在屋後花園共舞，Sam還喝了一小杯他最愛的紅酒，兩個人一起躺臥在最熟悉的暝床上。隔天清晨，他在摯愛的妻子懷中過世。
疾病末期，生活品質與生命長度往往無法兼得。若對於死亡與臨終顯得懼怕、排斥，恐怕會為了求生存，錯失了可以圓夢的黃金時期。如果「臨終時的選擇」是一個日常中如「聚餐吃什麼？」的話題，我們便不會因為對誇大的死亡恐懼，或對於醫療科技有過高期待，而用盡努力想要逃避死亡，使臨終者難以善終。
讓死亡「如常」？您可以：
●每天訂個固定的時間（如晨起梳洗時、通車上班時）想一想：「若今天是我生命中的最後一天，什麼是我一定要完成的事？」在今天努力完成這個「心願」。
●在與家人、朋友聚餐時，試著提出這個話題：「當我病得很重，行動受限，只能依賴別人照顧時，我想得到怎樣的陪伴與照顧？」
●有機會到醫院探望生病的親友時，可以問問病人「住院的心情如何？」認真傾聽他的感受，也想想「如果生病的是我，我會…」
這些事情沒有標準答案，也不會讓人嚮往死亡，只是生活中的思考練習，讓人皆有之的死亡恐懼如實而不誇大的存在。
常常在腦中預演這些課題，並與家人、朋友分享交流，只要我們願意多了解、多接觸，就能在面對生死大關時，泰然處之，做出最好的決定。
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