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別為小事抓狂
How to stop sweating the small stuff
Blowing up over small things takes a strong physical and emotion toll
over the years
Research suggests that we can train ourselves to not sweat the small
stuff
When the cable guy is a no-show, reframe the situation in a positive
light
If you feel anxious about something, think about ways to solve the
problem
How to do relaxation breathing
At the same time, say to yourself what you
feel (I am upset), then let that label disappear from view. "Naming your
emotions as you're feeling them reduces the activation of your emotional brain
and engages your reasoning brain," says Hanson. Now you can focus on
fixing the problem, which could be as simple as sending out a recap memo on
your presentation that includes a summary and the points that you missed.
You feel: Anxious
The situation: Your husband is running late
(though he swore he would be on time). Now you're going to be late for your
appointment, and your toddler just wiped his nose on your skirt.
How to stay calm: Problem-solve. If
even-keeled people rarely appear stressed, it's because they're too busy
looking for answers. A tardy spouse and a soiled skirt aren't catastrophes to
be cursed at but circumstances to be fixed. Dorlen suggests asking yourself,
immediately after the offending incident happens, How am I going to solve this?
You feel: Disrespected
The situation: Somehow, your offer to bring
back coffee for an office mate has turned into an order for six complicated
lattes. As you rattle off the list to the barista, you notice that she is
rolling her eyes.
How to stay calm: Speak positively. To
understand why this is important, it helps to know a little brain anatomy. The
brain is made up of cognitive and emotional parts, and the emotional part is
composed of various circuits, says Andrew Newberg, M.D., director of research
in integrative medicine at Thomas Jefferson University Hospital, in
Philadelphia.
These circuits include the reward system,
which reinforces positive experiences, and the sympathetic nervous system,
which connects the brain to the body and issues a fight-or-flight response when
you feel stressed. Positive words (which we grew up associating with something
pleasant, such as caring teachers) activate the reward system. Negative words
(which we associate with something unpleasant, like playground bullies) spike
angry or sad thoughts.
You feel: Disappointed
The situation: You've been planning this
cocktail party for weeks. Now that the big day is here, it's snowing. Heavily.
How to stay calm: Embrace optimism.
"Behind every setback, there's an expectation that things should be
different," says Dorlen.
Even-keeled people are no different, but
when things don't go as planned, they feel hopeful that circumstances will get
better. Which in this case may mean thinking, "with fewer people, our
gathering will be much more intimate and relaxed. And who doesn't love that on
a cold winter's night?"
"Optimism buffers the effects of
stress—not only for everyday hassles but also for life-altering
challenges," says Madelon Peters, Ph.D., a professor of experimental
health psychology at Maastricht University. Optimism is also associated with resilience.
That's why optimists are better able to bounce back after difficult times.
1.
How to control anger?
What are the tips to tame your temper?
2.
What are the things to do when
you feel extremely angry?
3.
How to deal with a bad temper
person?
4.
How to deal with impossible
people?
5.
How to relieve anxiety? (with
stress control techniques)
6.
What to do who deal with a
short-tempered partner? (a girlfriend/ a boyfriend)
7.
What to do when things go
wrong?
8.
Does hot weather impacts on our
mood?
漂亮與成功
Good looks help you get ahead if you're this gender
It is a common complaint among women that only attractive females get ahead in the workplace and that their careers can fade with their looks.
However a new study has shown that, in fact, it is men who should be more concerned.
Being good looking helps a man in businesses, but appears to have little impact on whether women succeed.
A study by Harvard University found that investors were more likely to put money into ventures if the man making the pitch is handsome.
However, pretty female entrepreneurs were no more likely to be successful than less attractive ladies.
The findings, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, also suggest there is a glass ceiling for women in the corporate world because backers prefer presentations from men.
Getting Ahead at Work: Looks Really Do Matter (By Molly Mann)
Looks do matter, even—maybe especially—in the workplace. According to research by Daniel Hamermesh and Jeff Biddle published in the Journal of Labor Economics, physically attractive people earn more per hour—about 5 percent on average—than their plain colleagues. And unattractive people earn 9 percent less per hour than their better-looking peers. When you crunch the numbers, this means that for average-looking people earning $40,000, their prettiest coworkers would make $42,000 and their least attractive colleagues would bank only $36,400.
Good-looking workers also tend to get more promotions, since they attract more positive attention than do others. Most bosses may not even realize they notice one employee more than another because of a glowing smile or—ahem—a large bosom, but they do.
Fair or not, there’s nothing explicitly illegal about discrimination based on physical characteristics, as long as it doesn’t touch the legislated areas of religion, race, sexual orientation, and disability. Unless you live in Washington, D.C., or Santa Cruz, California, an employer is completely within his rights to pass you over for a job based on your appearance. The laws that forbid other kinds of discrimination fail to cover prejudicial or preferential treatment based on looks, says James McDonald Jr., managing partner at the Irvine office of the employment-law firm Fisher& Phillips LLP.
Questions:
1.
Do you think good looks really
help people get ahead?
2.
Do you think good looks will
get people that job, promotion and raise?
3.
Pros and cons of being good
looking?
4.
Do you believe the idea that
beautiful people are more successful?
5.
How to be good looking?
6.
How to be an attractive person?
7.
Are beautiful people happier?
“good looks “help them get rich?
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