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要快樂嗎? 跟陌生人聊聊
Want To Feel Happier Today? Try Talking To A Stranger
Paul Nicolaus
The mood boost of talking to strangers may seem fleeting, but the research on well-being, scientists say, suggests that a happy life is made up of a high frequency of positive events. Even small positive experiences — chatting with a stranger in an elevator — can make a difference.
Many of us tend to do just about anything to avoid conversation or even eye contact with strangers. And smartphones make it easier than ever to do that. A recent study found that phones can keep us from even exchanging brief smiles with people we meet in public places. But a body of research has shown that we might just be short-changing our own happiness by ignoring opportunities to connect with the people around us.
Several years ago, University of British Columbia psychologist Elizabeth Dunn and her colleague Gillian M. Sandstrom tested whether short conversations with strangers could lift moods. They asked participants to enter a busy coffee shop and grab a beverage — half would get in and get out, and half would strike up a conversation with the cashier.
"We found that people who were randomly assigned to turn this economic transaction into a quick social interaction left Starbucks in a better mood," Dunn says. "And they even felt a greater sense of belonging in their community."
The same researchers found that these seemingly trivial encounters with the minor characters in our lives — the random guy at the dog park or the barista at our local coffee shop — can affect feelings of happiness and human connection on a typical day.
One day, during a daily train ride, he noticed something paradoxical. People — social creatures — were basically ignoring one another. Why, he wondered, if connecting with others makes us happy, do we so often avoid it?
Either solitude really is more enjoyable than talking to strangers, he figured, or we have mistaken assumptions holding us back.
His curiosity led to a series of experiments revealing that train and bus commuters who interacted with other passengers experienced a more pleasant ride — even when they believed they would prefer the solitude of, say, reading a book.
It is fear that the person sitting next to us won't enjoy talking to us that makes us keep to ourselves, Epley found. But when we do talk to each other, those social interactions with strangers tend to be both less awkward and more enjoyable than most people predict.
If striking up small talk with a stranger sounds daunting, you might be relieved to hear that even something as simple as making eye contact offers benefits.
No one likes feeling invisible when someone walks past. The Germans even have a term for it — wie Luft behandeln, which means "to be looked at as though air."
Kipling Williams, a Purdue University psychologist, studied how people felt when a young woman walked by them and either made eye contact, made eye contact while smiling, or completely ignored them. Even brief eye contact increased people's sense of inclusion and belonging.
"Just that brief acknowledgment, that brief glance — with or without a smile — made them at least temporarily feel more socially connected," Williams says. And it works both ways. Those that had been "looked through" felt even more disconnected than the control group.
So, how can we dodge the risks of loneliness and stop short-changing our own happiness?
It might be easier than you think.
"It takes very little to acknowledge somebody's existence," Williams says.
Start with folks like the cashier in a grocery store or the barista at your local coffee shop, Dunn says. You've got to interact with them anyway, so you might as well make an effort to turn it into a friendly exchange.
And be mindful that using your smartphone sends a signal that you're not interested in interacting with the people around you. Put it away and you easily remove that barrier, she says.
The mood boost of talking to strangers may seem fleeting, but the research on well-being, Epley says, suggests that a happy life is made up of a high frequency of positive events, and even small positive experiences make a difference.
下流老人在日本
Poverty among elderly in Japan
by Floro Mercene Tempo Online
Despite the concentration of the nation’s huge household savings among Japan’s elderly, poverty among the post-65 population is also rising. The data shows that people 65 or older account for more than half of the nation’s households living on welfare due to financial difficulties.
Japan is the world’s most rapidly aging society as older Japanese continue to live longer lives and younger Japanese continue to put off having children. As of 2016, elderly people accounted for 26.7% of Japan’s 127.11 million citizens. About 90 percent of the welfare-dependent elderly households consisted of a single member, meaning senior citizens living alone, possibly with no relatives they can turn to for help.
Data shows the steep gap between the haves and have-nots among the elderly population, and large numbers of senior citizens who live below the poverty line do not apply for welfare benefits.
The annual white paper on crime by Japan’s Justice Ministry reflects official concern over rising criminality among the country’s growing ranks of retirees, which have doubled in the last decade. Mostly petty crimes like shoplifting and theft committed by elderly, many of who live alone, secluded, and with meager savings.
One researcher says that the spike of petty crime can be traced to a number of factors. Those elderly are feeling lonely, bored, and unafraid of the legal ramifications. Many have even come to see as an upgrade from their daily lives. “If you are arrested, you still get a roof over your head, you’re fed three times a day and you get health checkups. So it’s sort of a win-win situation either way”, she said.
The Japanese government has set aside nearly $500, 000 to hire additional nursing staff to the country’s 70 prisons.
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