周六(12/8)1.幽默與吵架2.咖啡與健康 下午4:00-6:00

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幽默與吵架

Is Humor OK to Use When You're Fighting?   psychologytoday

People love funny people.  A good sense of humor is an incredibly attractive quality, one of the most important qualities that people look for during relationship initiation (Buss, 1998). But once a relationship is established, how does humor affect relationship quality? In particular, how does humor work during conflict?

Couples argue. From serious matters to less serious concerns, we fight about finances, what TV show to watch, loyalty, who ate the last ice cream sandwich.. it's natural to have couple conflict.

So can humor help, if well-timed and well-received? That witty comment might suddenly dissolve tension and help put the conversation into perspective. But in the throes of a heated argument, just imagine the effects of an ill-timed joke: Instead of diffusing the situation, it could ignite anger and escalate the conflict.

Winterheld and colleagues (2013) recently investigated how humor operates during romantic relationship conflict by inviting couples into the lab to discuss either a serious or trivial “unresolved relationship problem.” The researchers videotaped the conflict discussion and coded participants’ verbal statements and non-verbal behaviors for attempts at humor, distress, anger, and satisfaction with the outcome of the conversation. Prior to the conflict discussion, the researchers also surveyed each member of the couple individually in order to assess some of their impressions of their relationship and to measure some personality characteristics.

To learn from their findings, we first need to appreciate that humor can be subdivided into four styles (Martin, Puhlik-Doris, Larsen, Gray, & Weir, 2003). The first two styles, affilitative humor and self-enhancing humor, are both positive humor styles. The former (affiliative) involves using wit, inside-jokes, or amusing comments to bring people together or ease tensions, the latter (self-enhancing) involves having a positive view of the world and using humor to gain perspective. The other two humor styles are both negative styles: aggressive humor and self-defeating humor. Martin and colleagues (2003) identify aggressive humor as sarcasm, humor that pokes fun, or biting jokes that are funny at the expense of others. In self-defeating humor, the butt of the joke becomes the self. People who use self-defeating humor might try to ingratiate themselves to others by making fun of themselves or by acting foolishly.

Are some humor styles more useful in conflicts than others? Yes, but it often depends on the nature of the conflict and aspects about the partner (Winterheld et al., 2013). In Winterheld and colleagues’ study, when individuals’ partners were emotionally distraught (i.e., highly distressed) those individuals appeared to be sensitive to their partners’ underlying attachment tendencies when choosing what type of humor to use: The more anxious the partner, the more these individuals opted for that soothing, benign style of affilitative humor.  his was much more useful than other styles of humor. Even in conflict, people recognize that highly anxious partners, when distressed, need the comfort and reassurance that affiliative humor provides. Less anxious people, on the other hand, may be better able to cope in the absence of affiliative humor.

 

咖啡與健康

The surprising health benefits of coffee   mayoclinic

Coffee has been around for a long time and blamed for many ills — from stunting your growth to causing heart disease — but newer research shows that it may actually have health benefits.

Recent studies have generally found no connection between coffee and an increased risk of heart disease or cancer.

In fact, some studies have found an association between coffee consumption and decreased overall mortality and possibly cardiovascular mortality, although this may not be true in younger people who drink large amounts of coffee.

Why the apparent reversal in the thinking about coffee? Earlier studies didn't always take into account that known high-risk behaviors, such as smoking and physical inactivity, tended to be more common among heavy coffee drinkers.

Studies have shown that coffee may have health benefits, including protecting against Parkinson's disease, type 2 diabetes and liver disease, including liver cancer. Coffee also appears to improve cognitive function and decrease the risk of depression.

However, the research appears to bear out some risks. High consumption of unfiltered coffee (boiled or espresso) has been associated with mild elevations in cholesterol levels.

In addition, some studies found that two or more cups of coffee a day can increase the risk of heart disease in people with a specific — and fairly common — genetic mutation that slows the breakdown of caffeine in the body. So, how quickly you metabolize coffee may affect your health risk.

Although coffee may have fewer risks compared with benefits, keep in mind that other beverages, such as milk and some fruit juices, contain nutrients that coffee doesn't. Also, adding cream and sugar to your coffee adds fat and calories — up to hundreds of calories in some cases.