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你的思想連線成功
This important mindset will make you more successful linkedin.com
In your mind, these stories are the truth, they’re gospel. In your mind, you simply have a realistic view of what you can and can’t do, what you are and what you aren’t good at. You’re just being honest with yourself, right? But remember this: who told you these things which are now the truth? Probably no one but yourself. So how certain can you be that they are in fact true?
What we’re actually talking about here are our self-limiting beliefs – beliefs that we all have about ourselves, to a lesser or greater extent in certain situations and in certain environments. They’re ‘self-limiting’ because if we let them control and dominate the thoughts we have about ourselves and our abilities, they can be hugely damaging to both our current and future career success, something I will come back to later.
The way you think has a huge impact on your propensity to learn
So, how can you move from a fixed to a growth mindset, and become more employable in the process?
How to switch your mindset and become more successful
I’m no expert in this area, but having read around this topic and reflected on my own experience, I think there are a few things you can start doing today to grow your growth mindset, and help secure your future career success:
1. Become more self-aware: Reflect on what your typical response is when faced with certain challenges, what triggers you to transition into a fixed mindset and how can you return to a position of growth? Do you worry about not being ‘good enough’ or doubt your ability to find a solution to a problem you feel you don’t have the skills to solve? Do you feel overwhelmed and fear failure, so focus your attention on other tasks, tasks which you know you’re naturally good at? When given feedback, do you feel your defences go up? What I’m trying to say here is that you need to think about how you feel at those key ‘trigger’ moments, listening to the voice in your head and what it’s telling you. When you do, you’ll be able to pick out those unhelpful self-limiting narratives going around in your head, narratives that you’ll need to silence if you are to move from a fixed to a growth mindset in any meaningful way.
2. Understand that your brain works like a muscle, it can be trained: This phenomenon is known as neuroplasticity, as has been explained by Professor and Neuroscientist, Michael Merzenich, the man widely acclaimed as the father of the concept of brain plasticity. Experiments have shown that not only is the brain designed to change, but also it’s functioning can be improved at any stage. Merzenich explains in this video that the human brain works much like a muscle, requiring challenges in order to grow. You therefore can’t expect your brain to grow if you’re constantly doing the same things, and not challenging it. Instead, Merzenich says that you need to stay in ‘challenge mode’. Just think about the process of getting fit; it takes reps and practice to build muscle, the brain is no different. To develop skill in a specific area, understand that it’s not your brain that’s stopping you from doing just that, it’s your mindset.
3. Consistently choose challenging tasks rather than safe ones: Overcome your fear of failure or looking stupid, ignore any self-doubt you have, and focus your time and energy on those tasks you perceive to be more difficult than others on your to do list. When you do, try to interpret and tackle these from a mindset of growth. Yes, you might fail. But in the process, you’ll learn something about yourself that you wouldn’t have done otherwise – including what you can do next time to ensure you do better in the future. With a shift in mindset and practising adopting this mindset, you can quickly expand your skills as you’re starting to approach every new challenge with enthusiasm and confidence, instead of with avoidance and fear.
4. If you think someone is better than you, don’t see them as a threat: Instead, change the way you think to consider how you can learn from them. This person you perceive to be threatening or intimidating might have technical expertise that would help you to make a breakthrough on one of your projects that’s been on standstill – or maybe they just have a certain way of doing things, of obtaining answers to a problem that you had never thought of before. Start to shift your thinking to realise that everyone you encounter is an opportunity to learn something or see things from a different perspective - that’s not something to feel threatened by, that’s something to embrace.
5. Understand that you’re not going to master a new skill overnight: Remember we’re never as good as we possibly can be at a given skill as soon as we start practising it – instead, it takes work and time to master. So, whenever you take on a new challenge or embark on learning a new skill, stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Instead, understand that you will encounter struggles at the beginning. Pick something that you can’t do at the moment – that one thing that you’ve always had some kind of mental block about. Spend time practising it. Don’t worry about not being good at it straight away, or about someone else being better. Just focus on your own learning journey, starting small and building your skills bit by bit from there. Over time, you’ll start to see progress – this will reinforce your inclination and confidence when it comes to learning, meaning you’re far more likely to continue on that journey, rather than bailing out at the first hurdle.
6. Make a conscious effort to dedicate time and effort (and don’t give up): Just think of all the skills you could have under your belt, that your fixed mindset is stopping you from developing – those things that could have won you that promotion earlier or are so crucial to growing your company. Don’t make the excuse that you “don’t have enough time”, to develop them, or “that’s someone else’s job”– instead, carve out the time. The highest-achieving people in history appreciated this. Just look at Albert Einstein, who observed that “it’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”
So, for the sake of your own career success, now is the time to shift your way of thinking, to block those damaging thoughts that circle in your mind, those thoughts that have the potential to rob you of the opportunity to build new skills - skills that could help secure your future employability.
擁抱治療師!
By Holly Gambrell May 18, 2020
We spoke with Arlington-based professional cuddler Indigo Dawn to learn more about the therapeutic method and its health benefits.
The benefits of physical touch include lowered heart rates and blood pressure, feelings of love and acceptance, reduced symptoms of depression and more. Neuroscientist Edmund Rolls proved that physical touch activates the brain’s orbitofrontal cortex, linked to feelings of reward and compassion. Touch therapy can come in many forms (think: that massage at your favorite spa or holding hands with your partner) and is a surefire way to feel better. One growing trend? Cuddle therapy. Professional cuddlers are paid to cuddle—platonically—if you don’t have a friend available for a snuggle sesh. Here, we spoke with Arlington-based professional cuddler Indigo Dawn to find out more.
Describe cuddle therapy.
Cuddle therapy fills a niche that is complementary to traditional talk therapy. In the traditional mental health profession, therapists can do a lot of great work but cannot touch clients, and touch is a core human need. It releases oxytocin and it also facilitates the development of authentic connection and the type of secure attachment that some people may have never had in its fullness. It can really provide a base for health and wellness and happiness.
How is a typical session formatted?
I will have clients sit across from me and talk about the basis of our session, that we are willing to speak up if something’s uncomfortable, just being really honest with each other. Then I will talk about explicit boundaries of the space to reaffirm and create the structure, because without me feeling safe, the type of healing that this service can provide is not possible. I give the client an opportunity to share their personal touch boundaries. I talk about the types of touch that I really love and ask them if they really love them too. I lead a short meditation. Then from there I will open up the space and I’ll ask them, “What do you most want in this moment, knowing you can change your mind because it’s a wide-open space?” Most clients have been envisioning spooning or what’s called the koala-style cuddle, but all sessions look different.
What are the main benefits for your clients?
I haven’t yet had a session where a client didn’t leave with a little smile on their face, and the tension drops in their jaw and their face around their eyes, their shoulders. Their breathing slows and there’s a visceral relaxation. Many clients will come away with an empowered sense of connection and self-awareness and self-esteem. // Sessions begin at
$100 an hour
This important mindset will make you more successful linkedin.com
In your mind, these stories are the truth, they’re gospel. In your mind, you simply have a realistic view of what you can and can’t do, what you are and what you aren’t good at. You’re just being honest with yourself, right? But remember this: who told you these things which are now the truth? Probably no one but yourself. So how certain can you be that they are in fact true?
What we’re actually talking about here are our self-limiting beliefs – beliefs that we all have about ourselves, to a lesser or greater extent in certain situations and in certain environments. They’re ‘self-limiting’ because if we let them control and dominate the thoughts we have about ourselves and our abilities, they can be hugely damaging to both our current and future career success, something I will come back to later.
The way you think has a huge impact on your propensity to learn
So, how can you move from a fixed to a growth mindset, and become more employable in the process?
How to switch your mindset and become more successful
I’m no expert in this area, but having read around this topic and reflected on my own experience, I think there are a few things you can start doing today to grow your growth mindset, and help secure your future career success:
1. Become more self-aware: Reflect on what your typical response is when faced with certain challenges, what triggers you to transition into a fixed mindset and how can you return to a position of growth? Do you worry about not being ‘good enough’ or doubt your ability to find a solution to a problem you feel you don’t have the skills to solve? Do you feel overwhelmed and fear failure, so focus your attention on other tasks, tasks which you know you’re naturally good at? When given feedback, do you feel your defences go up? What I’m trying to say here is that you need to think about how you feel at those key ‘trigger’ moments, listening to the voice in your head and what it’s telling you. When you do, you’ll be able to pick out those unhelpful self-limiting narratives going around in your head, narratives that you’ll need to silence if you are to move from a fixed to a growth mindset in any meaningful way.
2. Understand that your brain works like a muscle, it can be trained: This phenomenon is known as neuroplasticity, as has been explained by Professor and Neuroscientist, Michael Merzenich, the man widely acclaimed as the father of the concept of brain plasticity. Experiments have shown that not only is the brain designed to change, but also it’s functioning can be improved at any stage. Merzenich explains in this video that the human brain works much like a muscle, requiring challenges in order to grow. You therefore can’t expect your brain to grow if you’re constantly doing the same things, and not challenging it. Instead, Merzenich says that you need to stay in ‘challenge mode’. Just think about the process of getting fit; it takes reps and practice to build muscle, the brain is no different. To develop skill in a specific area, understand that it’s not your brain that’s stopping you from doing just that, it’s your mindset.
3. Consistently choose challenging tasks rather than safe ones: Overcome your fear of failure or looking stupid, ignore any self-doubt you have, and focus your time and energy on those tasks you perceive to be more difficult than others on your to do list. When you do, try to interpret and tackle these from a mindset of growth. Yes, you might fail. But in the process, you’ll learn something about yourself that you wouldn’t have done otherwise – including what you can do next time to ensure you do better in the future. With a shift in mindset and practising adopting this mindset, you can quickly expand your skills as you’re starting to approach every new challenge with enthusiasm and confidence, instead of with avoidance and fear.
4. If you think someone is better than you, don’t see them as a threat: Instead, change the way you think to consider how you can learn from them. This person you perceive to be threatening or intimidating might have technical expertise that would help you to make a breakthrough on one of your projects that’s been on standstill – or maybe they just have a certain way of doing things, of obtaining answers to a problem that you had never thought of before. Start to shift your thinking to realise that everyone you encounter is an opportunity to learn something or see things from a different perspective - that’s not something to feel threatened by, that’s something to embrace.
5. Understand that you’re not going to master a new skill overnight: Remember we’re never as good as we possibly can be at a given skill as soon as we start practising it – instead, it takes work and time to master. So, whenever you take on a new challenge or embark on learning a new skill, stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Instead, understand that you will encounter struggles at the beginning. Pick something that you can’t do at the moment – that one thing that you’ve always had some kind of mental block about. Spend time practising it. Don’t worry about not being good at it straight away, or about someone else being better. Just focus on your own learning journey, starting small and building your skills bit by bit from there. Over time, you’ll start to see progress – this will reinforce your inclination and confidence when it comes to learning, meaning you’re far more likely to continue on that journey, rather than bailing out at the first hurdle.
6. Make a conscious effort to dedicate time and effort (and don’t give up): Just think of all the skills you could have under your belt, that your fixed mindset is stopping you from developing – those things that could have won you that promotion earlier or are so crucial to growing your company. Don’t make the excuse that you “don’t have enough time”, to develop them, or “that’s someone else’s job”– instead, carve out the time. The highest-achieving people in history appreciated this. Just look at Albert Einstein, who observed that “it’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”
So, for the sake of your own career success, now is the time to shift your way of thinking, to block those damaging thoughts that circle in your mind, those thoughts that have the potential to rob you of the opportunity to build new skills - skills that could help secure your future employability.
擁抱治療師!
By Holly Gambrell May 18, 2020
We spoke with Arlington-based professional cuddler Indigo Dawn to learn more about the therapeutic method and its health benefits.
The benefits of physical touch include lowered heart rates and blood pressure, feelings of love and acceptance, reduced symptoms of depression and more. Neuroscientist Edmund Rolls proved that physical touch activates the brain’s orbitofrontal cortex, linked to feelings of reward and compassion. Touch therapy can come in many forms (think: that massage at your favorite spa or holding hands with your partner) and is a surefire way to feel better. One growing trend? Cuddle therapy. Professional cuddlers are paid to cuddle—platonically—if you don’t have a friend available for a snuggle sesh. Here, we spoke with Arlington-based professional cuddler Indigo Dawn to find out more.
Describe cuddle therapy.
Cuddle therapy fills a niche that is complementary to traditional talk therapy. In the traditional mental health profession, therapists can do a lot of great work but cannot touch clients, and touch is a core human need. It releases oxytocin and it also facilitates the development of authentic connection and the type of secure attachment that some people may have never had in its fullness. It can really provide a base for health and wellness and happiness.
How is a typical session formatted?
I will have clients sit across from me and talk about the basis of our session, that we are willing to speak up if something’s uncomfortable, just being really honest with each other. Then I will talk about explicit boundaries of the space to reaffirm and create the structure, because without me feeling safe, the type of healing that this service can provide is not possible. I give the client an opportunity to share their personal touch boundaries. I talk about the types of touch that I really love and ask them if they really love them too. I lead a short meditation. Then from there I will open up the space and I’ll ask them, “What do you most want in this moment, knowing you can change your mind because it’s a wide-open space?” Most clients have been envisioning spooning or what’s called the koala-style cuddle, but all sessions look different.
What are the main benefits for your clients?
I haven’t yet had a session where a client didn’t leave with a little smile on their face, and the tension drops in their jaw and their face around their eyes, their shoulders. Their breathing slows and there’s a visceral relaxation. Many clients will come away with an empowered sense of connection and self-awareness and self-esteem. // Sessions begin at
$100 an hour
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