板橋區文化路一段421巷11弄1號 (陽光甜味咖啡館)
給面子 丟面子
Saving Face, Losing Face: Etiquette in Asia
By Greg Rodgers tripsavvy
How to Save Face in Asia
Unless physical harm is imminent, there are very few good reasons to shout in Southeast Asia — particularly Thailand.
Shouting and arguing in public are strictly frowned upon. Causing a scene actually makes bystanders lose face through embarrassment suffered on your behalf! Even if you win whatever argument, you'll lose as a whole. Although frustrating, always stay patient and calm until both parties reach a resolution.
Even if you find yourself fully in the right, making a small compromise will allow the other party to save face — and that's a very good thing for future interaction.
Tip: In many Asian countries, a giggle or nervous laugh can indicate someone is uncomfortable. People will often giggle nervously when risking a loss of face. If you trigger too many giggles with statements or questions, it may be time to back down.
Negotiating Without Loss of Face
Understanding the concept of face not only builds better relationships, it can save you money.
When negotiating prices in Asia, keep in mind that a shopkeeper cannot risk a loss of face. Even though the vendor may want to make the sale, they will avoid a loss of face by refusing to meet your inflexible price.
Drive a hard bargain but always give in just a little on your final price. This allows the merchant to not feel as though they lost something. Don't worry: no matter what they claim, they'll never actually lose money on a sale. It's more about the feeling after the sale is completed.
One option for smoothing over some tough negotiating would be to buy some other small item from their shop for the listed price. Optionally, you could praise their business and promise to refer other travelers to them.
Simple Tips to Prevent Someone From Losing Face
Do what you can to avoid all potential embarrassment for others.
Avoid pointing out someone's mistakes openly in front of their peers.
Politely refuse a gift at first but always eventually relent and accept with both hands. Don't open it immediately unless the giver requests!
Don't make a big deal when giving someone a gift. It's better not to demand they open it right away.
If you give to beggars, do so discreetly.
Show extra respect by deferring to all elders and people of rank, title, or uniform.
When negotiating prices in Asia, be a little flexible on your final price.
Always allow your host to pay for dinner. You can offer a little resistance, but eventually allow them to pay. Don't offer to leave a tip!
南韓算命界
South Korea fortune-telling will soon be a $3.7bn business
DESTINY is usually said to lurk in heavy drapes of purple velvet, in the wicked glint of a crystal ball, behind a veil of heady incense or in the tuck of a gold-chiffon turban. Your correspondent went in search of hers among a crush of Korean schoolgirls at the “Broken Heart Tarot Club” in booming Hongdae, a university district in Seoul. The café’s façade is an inviting jumble of pink neon signs and glowing graffiti. At the next table, a hip tarot reader spread a deck face-down for two girlfriends in oversized denim jackets, who took turns picking out cards and sipping on their lattes. He looked as cool as them, more rapper than rune-reader, in dark glasses with a chain around his neck.
Interrogating the decorated cards costs 3,000 won (about $2.75) a question. A tarot reader assesses the character of her clients first. Two flicks of her wrist, and a pair of Queens appears. “You chose the strongest set in the deck,” she says brightly. “Fame is within reach.” Will a move to a new country go smoothly? The Beggar. “The start will be hard, but you can succeed if you ask for help.” Will the Koreas go to war? Death and The Emperor show up, apparently the tarot incarnations of Kim Jong Un (here a scythe-wielding woman in blue veils) and Moon Jae-in, the leaders of North and South Korea. “Death plays tricks but the Emperor is wise,” the reader assures.
“Broken Heart” is among dozens of fortune-telling businesses on the street, packed between cheap clothes and cosmetics shops. Business is brisk. Other stores offer the Korean arts of face-reading, palm-reading—one entices clients with a detailed mapping of Barack Obama’s raised hand at his presidential swearing-in—and saju. An ancient form of divination, saju analyses the cosmic energy at the hour, day, month and year of a person’s birth from Chinese astrological records and texts. A seer at “Broken Hearts” says she began to study saju two decades ago (she says she found it hard to trust other fortune-tellers), but took up tarot recently to keep up with the times. “The young like it. The cards are pretty, it’s cheap and it’s quick,” she says.
The otherworldly in South Korea will soon be a 4trn won ($3.7bn) business, predicts the Korea Economic Daily, a local newspaper. Paik Woon-san, head of the Association of Korean Prophets, estimates that there are over 300,000 fortune-tellers in the country, and 150,000 shamans, many of whom provide clairvoyance. Unusually in a country of evangelical Christians and devout Buddhists, it continues to thrive as anything from a bit of curious fun to a dependable guide for making everyday decisions.
Now fortune-telling apps for smartphones are beguiling city kids, taking the occult into the otherworldliness of cyberspace. Handasoft, a software developer, has launched 13 apps in the past five years.
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