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正面思考讓人懶惰妨礙成功?
Positive thinking can make you too lazy to meet your goals
By Renuka Rayasam BBC
Just being positive and happy go lucky is not going to work
“Positive thinking is something in the DNA of most entrepreneurs,” says Stausholm, who is based in Copenhagen and who previously worked for shipping company Maersk and then went on to consult for large companies on sustainability issues. “If you don’t think positively, you would never start a business.”
But when the business fell apart, he learned an important lesson. There’s a downside to the power of positivity. “Just being positive and happy go lucky is not going to work — it has to be mixed with realism,” he says.
The power of positive thinking has been a guiding principle for business leaders at least since 1936 when Napoleon Hill published Think and Grow Rich. Two decades later Norman Vincent Peale wrote The Power of Positive Thinking, which has sold more than 21 million copies worldwide, and more recently Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret has gripped business leaders and others with its promises of success based on positive thinking.
According to these positive-thinking tomes, negative thoughts or doubts stand in the way of success. But, in fact, a new crop of research finds that positive thinking has its limits — and even brings its own pitfalls. Positivity could be limiting your success.
The seductive power of fantasy
Gabriele Oettingen, a professor of psychology at New York University who wrote Rethinking Positive Thinking: Inside the New Science of Motivation, says that when she started studying positive thinking, she discovered that energy, measured by blood pressure, drops when people generate happy fantasies about the future like landing a job or earning money.
They fantasise about it and then feel already accomplished and relax
Often when people fantasise about achieving their goals they may not exert enough effort to actually achieve them, she says. Oettingen found, for example, that two years after university graduates fantasised about getting a job, they ended up earning less and receiving fewer job offers than those graduates who were more filled with doubt and worry. It turns out they also sent out fewer job applications.
Positive thinking can breed laziness
“They fantasise about it and then feel already accomplished and relax,” and lose the motivation it takes to make things happen, she says.
Nimita Shah, the director of the London-based group The Career Psychologist, says people often come in feeling frustrated about not being able to manifest their wishes and then they feel guilty about having negative thoughts, worried that their downbeat thinking is part of the problem.
“It’s similar to having an immediate diet quick fix,” says Shah. Fantasising about the future may help create a short-term boost, but “in the long term it adds to people feeling worse”.
Q:
What do you think the saying “positive thinking can make you too lazy to meet your goals”?
Do you agree the idea that “positive thinking can breed laziness”?
Are you a positive or negative thinker? Is it good to think positively always?
Does positive thinking guarantee success?
What does negative thinking do to you?
Is it good or bad to think about the future?
名模司機互毆/怒氣控制
Dispute between actress, taxi driver goes public By Jason Pan Taipei times
A taxi ride which ended in a scuffle between actress Yuni Lee (李妍憬) and driver Ho Yeh-hui (賀業輝) has turned into a public row.
Lee accused Ho of punching and kicking her, and said she would file assault charges against him, adding that he worked for Taipei-based M-Taxi Co.
The row sparked a media frenzy when several different videos, taken by passers-by, were yesterday uploaded to the Internet, after Lee received the backing of entertainer and former Democratic Progressive Party legislator Yu Tian (余天) at a news conference on Monday.
Anger management: tips to tame your temper mayoclinic.org By Mayo Clinic Staff
Think before you speak
In the heat of the moment, it's easy to say something you'll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the situation to do the same.
Once you're calm, express your anger
As soon as you're thinking clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them.
Stick with 'I' statements
To avoid criticizing or placing blame — which might only increase tension — use "I" statements to describe the problem. Be respectful and specific. For example, say, "I'm upset that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes," instead of, "You never do any housework."
Know when to seek help
Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at times. Consider seeking help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.
Q:
What do you think the dispute between the actress, taxi driver?
What do you think the actress Yuni lee behavior?
How to get a taxi ride safely?
How to avoid increase tension in a dispute?
What are the anger management tips?
How to calm yourself when you are angry?
How to speak without hurting others when feel upset?
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